Recently I have been exploring the topic of judgement, as I have come to realise that I have been a very judgmental person for most of my life. Judging others is so much a part of what I do that I’m often not even aware that I am doing it. I have found that in order for me to be able to see a behaviour clearly, I need to be able to get a bit of distance between me and the behavior: but my problem with being judgmental is that it has often felt as close to me as my breath.
When we stop to listen to what people are saying – the way they talk about their lives, relationships, themselves – do we hear moaning or appreciation? It appears that it is more common to have a negative slant on things, with a tendency to blame or complain about the situations we find ourselves in.
Our media industry demonstrates better than anywhere else that the supply and demand for negativity, drama and emotionalism is a feedback loop we have created and continue to feed with gusto.
As I sit here writing I can feel a warmth in my chest and a gorgeous feeling of yumminess throughout my body. I feel confident, strong, light and playful, I can feel sparks of joy, and most of all I feel appreciative of all that I have done for myself over the last few weeks.
Only a few short weeks ago I was in a very dark place of depression and confusion. Life had thrown a few big challenges my way over the course of a few months in the form of what felt like attacks from forces that appeared to be bigger than me. My reaction was to be scared, withdraw, and contract into a hidey hole thinking that is where I would be safe.
Writing about appreciation seems to bring up a lot for me. Today after weeks of delay, I asked myself, “Why is this so hard?” I am pretty good at clocking the beauty that surrounds us all – the sun, the sky and the stars. I know I am blessed to have a job, family, wonderful partner and an incredible group of friends. Many times I have been in awe of the way incredible opportunities have opened up, or of the colours of the sky during sunrise or sunset. When I speak to people I find it easy to tell them how much I appreciate them, the way they light up my life and what they bring to the world, – I do it often. Last and certainly not least, I’ve had more things to appreciate than I would have thought possible since I discovered Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine around seven years ago. So seriously, what’s the problem?
I’ve been on the ‘missing list’ for the majority of my life. Along with a lot of other ‘missing’ folk.
And the truth is, I have really missed me not being around.
I, like so many others, had access to a knowingness as a child of how we could and should be. I was aware of it from an early age. I didn’t speak often but when I did, it was for all.
I was born and grew up in Australia and can say that as a culture and race of people, we have pretty much mastered the art of avoiding appreciation. This is kind of funny really because there is so much to appreciate about Australia, our culture and landscape. There are so many awesome and amazing people that I have met and been privileged to know in Australia!
However, it appears to me that many habitual aspects of our language and ways of interacting with each other can block truly appreciating one another.
What is appreciation, really?
I recently pondered on this and realised my understanding of appreciation was quite shallow – based on either material gain, pictures of success and/or pandering to please and keep others and myself happy. Examples of things I have ‘appreciated’ from this perspective include: Continue reading “Peeling Back the Layers of Appreciation”
I do not have an automatic tumble clothes dryer. You know, one of those machines you can put your wet washing into, close the door and then press a button that makes the machine go around and around with hot air to dry the clothes, sheets, towels or blankets.
Sometimes when I don’t have something I can begin to wish that I did, feeling a sense of lack without it and even becoming incredibly distracted, planning how I could achieve acquiring it either now or in the future.
However, I have realised in the case of the humble tumble clothes dryer that this is simply not the case. In fact, today as I took my freshly washed feather down jacket to the local laundromat (because this item does require tumble drying), I found myself not cursing that I did not have a dryer, but deeply appreciating everything that not having a tumble clothes dryer offers.
Recently I had a wonderful lesson presented to me on value and the wealth inherent in appreciation.
Someone recently completed a task for me that simplified my day no end.
It wasn’t part of their job but they had noticed I was having some difficulty with it, they knew how to do it and offered to finish it. In what seemed like no time at all they sent an email letting me know it was done. I was touched that they had taken the time in their busy day to support me so swiftly.
I started to dash off a thank you in reply – “You are a treasure.” I was just about to press send and I stopped. It didn’t feel right, it felt like just a throwaway line, an automatic response, empty; what we usually say without thinking. In effect, not truly valuing or appreciating them.
We are moving to our new house in a few weeks, so this particular Sunday morning I had committed to getting started with some packing. I was halfway through the first box when I had a strong impulse to go and wash my new car so – box abandoned with slight feelings of guilt – outside I went with my favourite car washing cloths.