Appreciation, an Accumulation of Wealth

Recently I had a wonderful lesson presented to me on value and the wealth inherent in appreciation.

Someone recently completed a task for me that simplified my day no end.

It wasn’t part of their job but they had noticed I was having some difficulty with it, they knew how to do it and offered to finish it. In what seemed like no time at all they sent an email letting me know it was done. I was touched that they had taken the time in their busy day to support me so swiftly.

I started to dash off a thank you in reply – “You are a treasure.” I was just about to press send and I stopped. It didn’t feel right, it felt like just a throwaway line, an automatic response, empty; what we usually say without thinking. In effect, not truly valuing or appreciating them.

I really did appreciate and value this caring gesture. So I wrote: “I treasure you.” And sent the email off and that was that.

Then yesterday I had a discussion with a colleague about valuing and appreciating ourselves and others. We realised this is something we don’t do enough, or if we think it and feel it we often don’t express it: all the beauty of value and appreciation kept locked up inside us, trapped behind the gateway of our lips!

There are many times in my life when I have been with someone and as we talked I have felt myself appreciating something about them – maybe the way they have dressed or applied their makeup, how they have attended to a task, admired what they are good at or simply the way they are – and though I might be thinking it in my mind, the words rarely passed my lips. I have gone away thinking that something was missing and then berated myself for not saying out loud what I felt.

At times I have thought that they will know how much I appreciate them, after all I am engaging with them and obviously enjoying being with them – right? And perhaps they do know, but words have so much power and so does the withholding of them. Each choice can be felt.

At times there may have been a comparison going on: jealousy maybe, envy, a begrudgingness, “How come they do this better than me?” etc. These are thoughts I have noticed in myself also; they are not things we want to contemplate but I feel we have all been there at some time or other.

An ex-partner had great difficulty saying appreciative words to me and the withholding could be painfully felt. Some time after we parted he told me he had always been jealous of what I could do and the ease with which I related to people, and owned up that he had deliberately withheld loving and caring words.

To be honest it was a relief to hear him say that as I had always known but had not let myself feel the devastation of it, even though as I know now, we feel everything all of the time.

My colleague and I also discussed the curious phenomenon of how people block your appreciation and valuing of them – reject it and deny it as if they can’t handle the beauty and the love coming their way.

I know how true this is having done this blocking many times myself: feeling not worthy of the words that have been spoken about me. We don’t see our own inherent worth or value.

As the person doing the appreciating we feel the weight of the reaction, the rejection, equally – and yes, it hurts.

It seems to me that compliments equally hurt when they are offered as a throwaway line, “You’re a treasure” etc. Words reeled off in passing without any connection to the person; resorting, as is so easy to do, to the polite platitude.

We can feel the emptiness in these words and brush it off. Maybe we begin to trust less and less, harbouring the unexpressed hurt and perhaps this is how we end up with a culture of surface ‘compliments’ but no real valuing, no real appreciation.

In recent years, as a result of the beautiful modalities and courses Universal Medicine has to offer, and in particular the Esoteric Yoga Stillness Program for Women, I have begun seeing and knowing my value and worth more. I have even been appreciating myself more. This has led to having so much more genuine appreciation of others.

Curiously, because of the simple action of bringing it back to me first, initially noticing the small things in myself that are so worth appreciating, it is becoming so much easier to appreciate and value others and to feel what to say that is absolutely true, spot on, full, real and which will then be accepted because the genuine-ness of it can be felt.

I have discovered that the more I connect to myself, to appreciating me and the way I am no matter what, the easier it is to express to others from a very true place; no longer a throwaway platitude but a genuine, “I noticed this about you and it is gorgeous to feel.”

An expansiveness happens in the body; it’s as if your very particles start singing and dancing, reaching out and connecting, mingling with the particles of others.

Woohoo, it’s delicious!

This morning I have looked at “I treasure you” again, realising there is so much more that could have been expressed. The things I have always felt about that person.

“I treasure you because of your warmth and your willingness and the way you notice what is needed. You go beyond what is expected of you. I really appreciate how much you care and I love the feel of you being there, the gorgeous person you are backing us up.”

Is that too much? : )

You know that the balance is shifting when instead of seeing the worst in yourself and people, you begin to see the treasure, and the more you see and feel that treasure in yourself the more there is to see and feel in you and in everyone else. And the easier it is to appreciate and to express that.

A fantastic accumulative equation.

It’s funny how the word appreciation is also used in banking terms as well. Money appreciating = an accumulation of wealth.

And it seems to me that it’s the same with us; when we value ourselves and make ‘appreciative’ deposits, we build up a bountiful fund.

No use leaving it sitting in the ‘Bank of Ourselves’ either, it absolutely needs to be taken out and shared.

Appreciation appreciates, an accumulation of true wealth.

By Jeanette, New Zealand

Related Reading:
Appreciation – A Pathway to Love
Appreciation, Appreciation, Appreciation…..
Appreciating the Role of a Housekeeper





769 thoughts on “Appreciation, an Accumulation of Wealth

  1. We are given so much from the heavens, what is there not to appreciate? All we have to do is align, Surender and ask, and our deepening relationship is always unfolding within our essences.

  2. “words have so much power and so does the withholding of them.” Words expressed in truth are felt in our body and are an invitation to equally express appreciation for all that is offered. A world bank of love and truth would pay dividends for all humanity.

  3. “You know that the balance is shifting when instead of seeing the worst in yourself and people, you begin to see the treasure, and the more you see and feel that treasure in yourself the more there is to see and feel in you and in everyone else.” Appreciation is an important step in letting go of judgement, we can begin to have a relationship with our own essence and the essence in others, and know people by who they truly are, not the behaviours or other things we often see. In this I feel appreciation helps us to build true relationships and harmony together.

  4. I’d definitely say we need more appreciation in our lives, of ourselves and others. It’s like retraining a muscle we haven’t used for a while but it is there to be used.

  5. True wealth is the appreciation of our divine essences and that we are all connected to God, so it is with Deep-Humble-Appreciate-Ive-Ness that we feel all that is around us, as it all comes from God! So thank you Janette, as our weath accumulates deeper levels of wealth and this is so Lovingly shared when we understand how blessed we are to appreciate. Humble being reconnecting to our Soul-full-ness or essences, and as we deepen in those things that we have as a Soul-full foundation our appreciation comes with a true authority and confirmation of our divine connection, thus giving us True purpose in life. So True appreciation comes with the understanding that what we have in life comes from the most divine source or God.

  6. Wow Jeanette, what you have expressed is beautiful. I love this line “Appreciation appreciates, an accumulation of true wealth.” it is as though we have it all upside down; well at least till we can acknowledge our hurts within ourselves, as it is a too big an ask to appreciation appreciation, until the turmoil inside of us begins to subside and the appreciation can then surface wholeheartedly.

  7. Thanks so much for this Jeanette, it’s been a joy to read today. “… people block your appreciation and valuing of them – reject it and deny it as if they can’t handle the beauty and the love coming their way.” Love is something that can take some time to get used to, we can feel how much we want it in our lives, but it can be something we need to learn to handle – surprising but true. We can also learn to handle ourselves around negative forces, like abuse and bullying, but when a new level of love comes our way – can we handle it?

  8. I am a person who can not not appreciate as in the moment I feel an appreciation inside me it comes out. For me it is how I appreciate and if it comes from my whole body it needs to be said – perhaps the other person needs this appreciation and I am not allowed to hold it back so to speak.

    1. Love what you have shared Esther, because as we deepen our appreciation of our essences, as this is the deepening of the Love for our most Godly essences, or Soul, and in Loving this “inside” we understand when to share what we feel and “to speak up.” So then because we are seeing divinity in another, as this is what is “within” us, the sharing of our appreciation deepens and our “whole body” feels it and so does their’s. They are not just words but are felt as a Livingness.

    2. Ester I’m with you on this one, not only can I not hold my appreciation back but I see no need to, hence me stopping complete strangers in the street to remark on how amazing their hair looks or how I was captivated by their dress as they were walking towards me. I have no agenda whatsoever, appreciation is simply an impulse in my body that I always say yes to. I love it, it’s become a daily ingredient in my life.

  9. Jeanette I agree with you we do not really appreciate each other enough and it is borne out by my work colleagues. I was asked to send a congratulatory note to a work colleague via a business APP and it had the automatic congratulation already typed in. I deleted that and wrote my own words and sent it off. A few days later I received a personal email letting me know that my few words had touched them deeply. Like you I don’t feel that we really express what we want to say enough and so we sell ourselves and others short.

  10. Deep appreciation of self and your qualities allows you to be open to those things that then grow you more.

  11. We can be very good at criticizing ourselves and others and seeing the ‘wrongs’ we do, and of course it is important to allow ourselves to see areas we can improve in, but we generally fall very short in the appreciation side of things and find it more difficult to really appreciate self or others. If appreciation is what builds us in life, and criticism undoes us, should they not come always together so that the undoing of something unsupportive can then be re-built (and some) so that the overall result is a beautiful growth and blossoming of the being as an expression of the person? This can easily be seen in children too – put them down and criticise them enough and they grow up feeling worthless and then making choices that refect that worthlessness. Encourage a child by truly and deeply appreciating their qualities and you will have someone who naturally wants to grow and learn and is open to hearing about those things that they may need to reflect on and revise how they do it.

    1. I noticed this years ago with a friend of mine they had such a loving mother as a young man they too were very gentle and loving as an adult with bags of confidence and self worth.

  12. ‘So I wrote: “I treasure you.” ‘ I am so inspired to appreciate and express this appreciation with others no matter if social convention, as I have understood it, says you only express appreciation to people you are close to and only seldomly for more impact – like only giving crumbs. In writing this I wonder if being reluctant to say what we appreciate about another is about us not evolving. How so? Well, appreciation asks us to be current to with what’s there. When we hold back, that’s when what we say becomes stale and doesn’t resonate.

  13. We don’t seem to value our colleagues enough and are far quicker to jump into judgement than appreciation. I realised that I was doing this at work the other day so I went into appreciation instead and felt so much lighter for it. Appreciation speaks volumes towards how we feel about ourselves and others, and can transform our lives.

  14. The moment you stop and feel the words you wrote feels a very responsible choice to make. It exposes something about how we can say whatever but from a superficial level and not allowing ourselves to connect, truly so, with others. It’s very beautiful to read the simplicity from the second message, it’s clear, truthful and direct. Thanks for sharing Jeanette so honestly

  15. It’s just so beautiful to feel how our days are filled with moments of realisation and expansion, and it is very much worth acknowledging and appreciating those moments.

  16. Having appreciation has this feeling of warmth and expansion within my chest. It’s there when I appreciate myself but when I appreciate what I bring with others then the expansion comes. This proves to me the power in appreciation and how we are not meant to do it all alone and that we need each other.

    1. That is very true and we will never understand the depth it is true if we do not first make space to experiment with it and continue to consider this experiment as ongoing with no end!

  17. I can now see an expansion happening when true appreciation is at hand, just as you say it is a magnification, and it feels amazing.

  18. This is so true – “when we value ourselves and make ‘appreciative’ deposits, we build up a bountiful fund.” This bountiful fund cannot but spill over and be shared with all around us equally so.

  19. The interesting thing I have noticed about appreciation is that it is not a one way street – I feel expanded and more light and lovely in my body whenever I express appreciation for another person.

  20. ‘An expansiveness happens in the body; it’s as if your very particles start singing and dancing, reaching out and connecting, mingling with the particles of others.’ Yes appreciation breaks us out of the box/ prison that we can hold ourselves in. Then suddenly there we are with our particles reaching out and really being with others.

  21. I expressed my appreciation to a young boy last night and he ignored me. I questioned whether he had heard me although I knew he had. I felt hurt but it made me aware and appreciate what it is like when I resist or dismiss appreciation from others. We can learn so much about ourselves when we are willing to be open to the moments of reflection supporting us in our day.

  22. This is a gorgeous blog to read today, I received so much joy and feel the lightness and space that is available when we simply appreciate and value ourselves, which cuts out any room for self-doubt and or lack of self-worth, which only keeps us less.

  23. I can very much relate to not feeling worthy of the words that have been spoken about me, so they are dismissed… simply, I was not able to receive love, sad but true. However, these days I love to give to myself, to self-care and self-nurture, which has made a significant shift in how much love I can now receive!

    1. I agree. Significant learning around this for me, the more I accept and appreciate me as being worthy of love, from myself first the more that is being directed back to me in so many ways from sources I would never have imagined. Living lovingly with oneself and being open to love from others begets more love without a doubt.

  24. Jeanette, I love what you share in your blog about appreciation being an accumulation of wealth. When we have this form of energetic wealth within our foundations, we have a solid base which will support us during the challenging periods that presents themselves to us as we go about our daily life.

  25. It is amazing when we start to feel the balance shift towards appreciation rather than criticism. It also seems to be accompanied by a sense of space, grace, and more ability to hold and understand others where they’re at.

    1. I agree Bryony, I am learning this at the moment, our appreciation can help us to hold the person as they truly are in their essence and not get caught up in their behaviours. We are all in a cycle making our return to our Soul, but for me if I get hurt then in can come the judgement or criticism. I’m finding appreciation of myself and the person helps me to tip the scale out of the reaction and come back to accepting the situation. Baby steps at the moment, but it’s great to be working on it and have conversations like this blog has started as support.

    2. Even the word ‘criticism’ conjures up the image of being chopped down with a pair of scissors but that’s what we do we to ourselves and to others, almost constantly. We live scissors at the ready.

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