Seeking Connection and True Relationships

by Dr Rachel Hall, Holistic Dentist, Kenmore, Brisbane

We live today in the most populated world in history, yet more people than ever feel lonely, detached and separated from society… and even from themselves. How can we, in the midst of all the people we meet every day, sometimes feel so alone?

We frequently live in a way where we see ourselves as separate from others, from nature and from Divinity itself. This sense of separation seems to be an essential part of being human, part of our individuality and personal identity. Yet it is our sense of separation that can cause suffering, especially when we view everything around us as ‘things’ that appear unconnected to us.

It is as if we live in our own personal, separate bubbles designed to preserve our individuality and keep the world at bay. When we view the world as external to us, it is all too easy to forget the wholeness of life.

Most of us recognise that we are physically separate from other people and naturally assume we are also spiritually, psychologically and energetically separate. This gives the illusion that we are our body and that everything beyond that is not a part of us.

But is this really how it is?

If you spend time with a newborn baby it’s hard not to notice the love they radiate, unmeasured and equally shared.

We were all once like this baby; full of love – trusting, open and connected to everyone we met equally.

What changed this for so many of us?

It is as if when growing up the hardships of life, the broken hearts and the disappointments we encounter gradually force us to enclose our love, tenderness and feelings under a thick layer of toughness, defensiveness and/or aloofness.

These ‘coping strategies’ appears to protect the hurt we are feeling – however, at what cost? To deny our vulnerability locks our heart, shutting out our love and the love of others.

Once we commence to shut down we diminish the capacity to rely on our inner feelings, we stop trusting and with that, lose the ability to connect fully with others.
As we withdraw and shut down, our emotional exchanges – our ability to be in touch with our own feelings – become more and more limited; leading to a catch-22 situation where we measure our love, giving more love to those we feel won’t hurt us and less to those we aren’t as comfortable with or as certain of.

It is ironic that by trying to protect ourselves we cut off from others and that this choice ultimately produces our deepest sense of separation, the separation to self. And thus we create for ourselves the illusion that we live disconnected from others, our self, God and our essential nature – Love.

Through the teachings of the Ancient Wisdom presented by Universal Medicine, many people, myself included, have experienced a deeper sense of connection to themselves and other people. Little by little, I have been able to let go of the ‘protective’ layer of toughness and start trusting my own inner feelings. In this way I share my love more equally and I feel connected to myself, others, Divinity and my essential nature, which I know to be love. I know there is a oneness to life and that I am not actually separate at all as I can feel my connection to everything in my heart.

In a world where so many are seeking connection and true relationships, I have learnt that this must come first, from me choosing to connect to me with a willingness to let my love out and the love of others in.

1,158 thoughts on “Seeking Connection and True Relationships

  1. Connecting to our essences is a simple truth that we can all understand so thank you Rachel as the power of being at-one with what resides within is super important.

  2. What is 22 catching, when we look at the way Love is catching-less, in more than 22 different ways, as our spirit has set us up to not understand how True Love works, and the simple One-ness that is equally available to everyone, and without any separation, the separating that affects us in more than 22 different ways.

    1. Gregbarnes888 I feel you have captured more than 22 ways our spirit holds us all in separation to our soul, so that it can keep us all in the loveless world it has created that we live in.

      1. Spot on Mary as one simple thing that deepens our relationship with our Soul is sticking to the old adage early to bed etc, and the ensuing wisdom.

  3. Having a soulful life it’s a choice. Like a precious garden, this way of life needs to be held and nurtured. Every moment asks to be more aware, more responsible to receive the love that already is within and to let it out, by simply being. It’s our choice the level of care we bring in our everyday living. When we fully cherish ourselves what we emanate is just gorgeous, deeply tender and very unique. Like a new baby born, the same joy and spark can be beautifully lived no matter our age.

  4. Stop for a moment and feel the beautiful flow within your body. Same pulse, same beating in our hearts, same essence…no way of feeling alone and separate when we are in union with ourselves.

  5. “ … to enclose our love, tenderness and feelings under a thick layer of toughness, defensiveness and/or aloofness.” Succinct and so true, it’s fairly universal how we mask our inner essence once we have had a hurtful experience, and we have a range of masks to choose from but it’s at a great loss to society because the essence we hide could be such a rich contributor to family and community. We are a global society living in a mass reduction of our inner beauty and we see that everywhere with the crime, chaos, unrest, and distress. We live cowering to our hurtful experiences when our love is a much greater power. I am yet to find anyone who can successfully turn this around other than Serge Benhayon, the work he offers humanity is truly incredible to heal the hurts and restore the love.

    1. Melinda what you have written is very true
      “We live cowering to our hurtful experiences when our love is a much greater power. I am yet to find anyone who can successfully turn this around other than Serge Benhayon, the work he offers humanity is truly incredible to heal the hurts and restore the love.”
      Serge Benhayon is the only person who tells humanity what is really going on with our lives and how we are cowed by an energy that doesn’t want us to regain the essence of who we truly are because then the game would be up for it. It feeds off our hurts and pain so it’s not something its going to give up easily. As you say if we heal those hurts and restore harmony then we will discover we are much more than we have been led to believe.

  6. Reading this I realised a belief that the lightness and joy we experience as kids doesn’t leave us when we grow up. Nor do we, as we age, separate from it. I know I have experienced this fact that we are not separate but the belief of ‘looking back’ popped up.

  7. Human life doesn’t value love, not the real essence of love that we all equally are, nor our sensitivity or fragility. Based on how human life currently is I can see why people have closed down to their own love to the point of not remembering it exists, and are unwilling or feel unable to let love in or out. As someone working through everything expressed in this blog I can understand the many hurts people hold including their own for separating from the love within, and how hard it seems at times to reconnect, even though the love inside of ourselves is untainted and untouched by life. That to me is why we need the reflections of those who have made their way back and can show how possible it is to be love again, and that it’s still there for everyone of us equally to live the love that we are in a world where so few are doing this.

    1. Melinda Knights I totally agree with you and literally thank heaven for bringing into this life those people who reflect back to humanity heaven on earth and walk our future so that we can feel what it is like to reconnect back to our soul and live in a soul-full way. As you say
      ‘even though the love inside of ourselves is untainted and untouched by life.’
      We have all forgotten how to reconnect back to this ‘love’ which is why the world is in the mess it is in today.

  8. What I can feel is how these coping strategies ultimately backfire on us, cementing us further in that moment of hurt and its imprint. When we think we are protecting ourselves and/or retaliating against the world, we don’t realise it is ourselves that we are doing that to.

    1. Fumiyo from my own experience I can say what you have written is true
      “When we think we are protecting ourselves and/or retaliating against the world, we don’t realise it is ourselves that we are doing that to.”
      I have been fighting myself and the world for years, which is a huge waste of time and has got me nowhere except more suffering. I’m discovering we cannot fight against the astral plane. What we can do is surrender within ourselves which allows us to go deep into our bodies to access our soul. When we do this the Astral plane loses its grip over us, because our bodily vibration changes which changes our movements and we become less dense and more spacious. It is a science which we are not taught, the only person I know that does teach this science is Serge Benhayon and he teaches Science, Religion and Philosophy as it was taught eons ago under the great Pyramids it’s called the Ageless wisdom because it is ancient in it’s ancestry.

  9. As we openly discussed the other night at dinner God is our father, True Father and the stars are our mother, True Mother and we can deepen our relationship with both to become a deeply loving Soul on this plan of existence.

    1. What I hadn’t considered gregbarnes888 is that we marvel at the moon and the stars but I never considered the space they are held in. If we stop and consider this, then what is space that it can support the sun and stars, consider how heavy our sun is and yet it is supported by space how is this and what is the space that holds it and the universe together?

      1. Great Question Mary, is it possible that when we understand all about space we will be in a different realm and open to the universal will that God comes from?

  10. I have also found through the teachings of the Ancient Wisdom presented by Universal Medicine,
    a sense of connection to myself and that actually we all matter to each other. There is an energy that binds us together and it is together we will eventually leave this plane of life.

  11. “. . . me choosing to connect to me with a willingness to let my love out and the love of others in.” We love and let love in with our first breath on earth but then we chose to stop to love. It is so good to get a reminder that we can choose in every second of our life to love again!

  12. The grand daddy purpose of life – “me choosing to connect to me with a willingness to let my love out and the love of others in.”

  13. Do we keep the world at bay from a sense of being hurt by it? And so we build ourselves a fortress and lock ourselves away and in doing so we detach ourselves from each other and the world. This would seem to imply that there is also lack of trust between us all.

    1. When we lose our connection to our inner knowing then we lose trust in our ability to feel what is true for us, and if we don’t trust ourselves how can we trust others.

  14. I am sharing my life with a young child and it is absolutely glorious because this child is being brought up firstly to know they are beautiful just as they are. This allows them to remain connected to themselves and the love that is within them. And they share this love openly with all others. If we were to honour all children in this way so that as they grow up they maintain a steady connection with themselves we would be living in a completely different society. It is to our detriment that we crush this love that flows through them so that by the time they reach the age of 9-10 they have switched off this flow of love and joy.

    1. Agreed Mary it is absolutely to our detriment that we do not nurture and cherish all children as they should be confirmed and cherished in their true loveliness of who they are. Something we definitely need to turn around and change and something that we should not have to think about in doing.

    2. If this change was introduced to the way that every child was parented the majority of our problems on earth would be eradicated. We really need books written on how to parent your child to be the love they are, and that also would include supporting the parents to live their own love – and both are completely possible and natural to us if we were to give it a go with support.

      1. Is it possible that this is why children are crushed and belittled so that they perpetuate the same movements as they grow up. If we are all kept in the same emotions then nothing changes. We need to make those changes in ourselves so we can confirm our children which will break the cycle we have been in trapped in for eons.

  15. We learn that we have to harden and toughen up to be in this world, but this is not true. If we all brought our tenderness to everything we do the world would become a very different place.

  16. “We were all once like this baby; full of love – trusting, open and connected to everyone we met equally.” and as we grow up we start to see that this is not how the world is, and so we learn coping strategies to get by in life and begin to separate first from ourselves and then from everyone and we no longer feel the connection we once had as a child.

  17. I have been looking at how I go into protection. All I am doing is protecting myself from feeling hurt, however, in this I am shutting myself off from people who are also protecting themselves from being hurt. So we are all walking around with these imaginary (but real) brick fortresses, which all they do is result in more isolation and pain. Taking them down, allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and letting people in is the way to remove these walls. This also supports others to do the same.

  18. I agree Rachel that the way we live life currently is so abusive towards each other that we feel we have to toughen up and grow a hide like a Rhino in order to cope with life. So that the tender and precious feelings we had as a baby have no place in life.

  19. It is ridiculous that we can feel lonely in a world that has more than 7 billion of us, but then it is not the quantity that counts, but how we are with our self, and how loving and caring we are that determines the quality we live in, and with, and thus also with each other that brings us truly alive.

  20. I have learnt for myself, with the support of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, that when we are disconnected from ourselves we are disconnected to all others, and in this disconnection we harm not only ourselves but everyone around us. Imagine what life would look like if we all were taught this basic way of living at primary school or at home with our families.

  21. I find it odd, but agree that it is true, that there seems to be an essential part of being human which means to separate from divinity. With very little in this world that supports and respects our divinity – not the divinity of an acclaimed person, place or thing – but us, innately, deeply, and most sacredly. For, if we, us humans, are not the ones who are divine, then how could we know that divinity actually exists?

  22. “We were all once like this baby; full of love – trusting, open and connected to everyone we met equally.” We have much to learn from our relationship with a new born baby.

  23. We “assume we are also spiritually, psychologically and energetically separate.” and yet we can be “on the same wavelength” with another and if there’s an emotional outburst of sorts, if we weren’t connected by anything, couldn’t one person explode and no one would get affected. Thing is we live in a medium whereby we feel another’s explosions/emotions/expressions like we pick up on second-hand smoke. There’s an energetic medium we live within and are all connected to each other by.

  24. So true – we live in a very crowded society yet many are feeling so lonely and unable to connect with others. And in our desperation, we seek to own and control what’s out there. The world remains a lonely place when we stay disconnected from ourselves.

  25. I have a newborn and a 2yr old and it is incredible to see the difference in them. Our newborn is so open and observant – our 2yr old has started to have tantrums and test people. She is gorgeous and very much herself but we can also tell when she behaves in a way that is not her and it is our responsibility to call this out.

  26. The moment that we re-connect with ourselves life opens up again and becomes very joyful, the opposite of the struggle involved when we are disconnected.

  27. Beautiful Rachel and also simple, but not always easy. The feeling to be connected again with ourselves, with God, with other people is something we all have once we enter life but cover-up by layers of protection. But it is always there, it remains untouched.

  28. Accepting more love in you will automatically connect you more to the All. As it is the fuel of our being which is in everyone innately the same. I do walk recently in allowing more love in my body- it is a beautiful permission you can give yourself.

  29. Choosing protection does the absolute opposite of what is trying to be achieved but when you’re caught in the hurt it seems the best option, to return to the surrendered and loving self is what truly supports.

  30. I have tangibly felt this a few times in my life .. how we are all one and got this again driving to work the other day. It is like we may see, think or feel that we are separate going about our individual way and day but actually we cannot ever escape the truth that there is in truth no separation we just, for whatever reasons (hurts etc) try and make it this way. I am genuinely looking forward to the day when humanity starts to truly realise and embrace this .. the fact that we are all one ✨

  31. The problem I have found with being selective about who to give your love to, that is, choosing those who you decide will not hurt you, is that even those who you have chosen are also learning through life and making mistakes. Which means that they too will, at some point cause harm and hurt. This is then all the more devastating if they have been ‘chosen’ as the one who is safe, the one will not ever hurt or harm. And so ensues the dramatic unfolding of fear-full exchanges, as we try to re-establish a safe ground with each other once again. Whereas, if love is given freely, with out need for return, expectation or condition. When love is a beholding quality of movement, of emanation, of understanding and intent, then everyone is given the space to learn and to grow, and relationships can be enriching – no matter the mistakes that we all make.

    1. I love this Shami you have shed some light on a way of being that I subscribe to of choosing people to love and when they do hurt me it totally reinforces the reasons I hold onto protection! Such a set up!

  32. Reading your blog I know you are speaking from experience, something that you have lived and now on the other side of this have a deeper understanding. You know it inside out and upside down which is pretty cool. Over the last few days my lungs have been telling me that even though I do not feel lonely or consider myself to be separate just how much I have been living not in true connection with what I know within. It feels like a blessing to have this awareness as now I can start to truly heal this and re-connect to a part of me deep within.

  33. It is such a truism, and yet it stands the test of time… We must connect with ourselves first, and this then becomes the foundation for all true relationships

  34. To me this is just one of the many lies that we as a society have fallen for
    “It is ironic that by trying to protect ourselves we cut off from others and that this choice ultimately produces our deepest sense of separation, the separation to self. And thus we create for ourselves the illusion that we live disconnected from others, our self, God and our essential nature – Love.”
    Until I met Serge Benhayon I had no idea just how much I had disengaged with life and just how little I knew about it and what is really going on. I never felt to question or discern the inconsistencies of our society.

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