Inspired by Serge Benhayon & Universal Medicine: Feeling the True Me


When I first started practicing Optometry 20 years ago, and for many years thereafter, I felt like I was an actor on a stage, but seldom the true me.

 

My approach was to ‘mimic my patient’ or ‘to follow their lead’. I was never taught this explicitly at the time, but just recently I attended a Customer Services workshop where this was recommended as a way to ‘wow’ your client.

I reflected back to a time when I was constantly measuring how another person was from the minute they walked through the door. If they were friendly and jovial, I would be too. If they were quietly spoken, I would drop my voice. I have always seen a lot of paediatric clients, many with ADD: when they were in my chair, I would rush around in a frantic spin trying to get everything done that I needed to do in as quick a time as possible.

At the end of every working day I was exhausted. Not because of the physical aspects of my job, but because of the energy I put into being what I thought everyone wanted me to be, and my constant measuring of everyone else. I thought, though not consciously, that I was meeting each person where they were at.

When I look back now, and if I think of the ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) child, what reflection did they get from me? Did they get a gentle person who could calmly work, being present with each task in every moment, without judgement? No! Did they get a reflection that there could be another way? Definitely not!

Since coming to the work of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, I have been presented with another way; a true way that supports not only me but everyone who walks through my door.

 

The reflection I have received from Serge Benhayon is that he is always the same, with everyone in every moment. He meets everyone with his full presence and attention. He never tries to be ‘nice’ or ‘polite’ or play social games. He is just himself, consistently – he ‘breathes his own breath’ and never holds back his truth and love.

From attending Universal Medicine events I have learned to support myself at work. To approach each person and task with my full presence. To work and move gently throughout the day and to honour what I feel in every moment.

I have learned to connect to me, to feel the true me and to express from there (without perfection, as I still have ‘wobbles’). I am naturally a friendly person who loves people: I love to chat, to listen and to share. Some days I feel tender and delicate, and I honour that too. Because I can now feel the loving essence inside of me, I am able to truly meet another. In other words, connect to that loving essence in everyone else and allow them to express however they so choose.

Now when you walk through the door, instead of the exhausted, racy actor, you get the true me!

 

Carmin Hall
Carmin Hall – “the true me”

By Carmin Hall, B.Optom  Grad.Cert.Ocular Therapeutics

Further Reading:
That Monday Morning Feeling – Not Living the True Me

931 thoughts on “Inspired by Serge Benhayon & Universal Medicine: Feeling the True Me

  1. We can confirm where people are at by mimicking them, or we can offer a reflection of us so they feel it independently of where are they. Mimicking is a great way to hide. Reflecting is a great way to enlighten; to offer something different, something that will forever remain with them and one day will inspire them to move forward.

    1. And often that reflection can be uncomfortable to give and receive. It might not always be gratitude we get for being truthful and loving, but actually often hate and abuse. I guess that is where we find out true strength.

  2. Thank you Carmin. The work of Serge Benhayon supports people to live an authentic life because you have you with you everywhere that you go!

  3. “I have learned to connect to me, to feel the true me and to express from there (without perfection, as I still have ‘wobbles’).” Its the courage and commitment to living life responsibility that keeps me coming back to who I am and allowing myself to share all of me with the world, with the odd wobble as you say Carmin. For that I am so deeply grateful to the continued love and inspiration shared by Serge Benhayon and Universal Mediciine.

  4. “The reflection I have received from Serge Benhayon is that he is always the same, with everyone in every moment. He meets everyone with his full presence and attention. He never tries to be ‘nice’ or ‘polite’….” I too have found Serge Benhayon to be an inspiring role model. I used to be a chameleon with people, changing my behaviour to fit in – and to be liked by others. I thought this was ‘a good thing!” However I have learned that being my true self- with everyone – is the way to go.

  5. We can make it about not disturbing a movement already in motion. But as we know there are movements and movements. Some are not worth it. If there is no one who reflects that, the movement will continue. We have the opportunity to be that loving reflection. It is just a choice.

  6. “He (Serge Behayon) meets everyone with his full presence and attention. He never tries to be ‘nice’ or ‘polite’ or play social games. He is just himself, consistently – he ‘breathes his own breath’ and never holds back his truth and love”.
    What a gorgeous, inspirational and true testimony to Serge Benhayon Carmen; also to yourself, what a joy to be greeted by you.

  7. This is a beautiful sharing Carmen as we really get to feel the real you which feels truly lovely and a gorgeous way for another to be met with that loveliness that we can feel.

  8. Such a great question – what are we reflecting to others as we move about our day? solidness or spin? a constantly changing chameleon or a commitment to just being and presenting ourselves, just as we are?

  9. When I am in the presence of someone who holds themselves steady and does not sway or change to suit the crowd, they stand out. It is a very powerful reflection and one that makes me then very aware of how I am being.

  10. Somewhere we pick up that it is ‘good’ or even advantageous to mirror others, especially in a service environment. No wonder you were exhausted, having to change costumes so many times in just one working day. And as you describe so aptly, what would your customers have felt?

  11. A beautiful testimony of when someone is inspired by Soul to give and live the love he or she felt, and so to give back the love they received and continue to receive. It is a matter of allowance that then makes that one step bigger and bigger for it does not take long until it is Our true path again.

  12. I used to be like a Chameleon and change my colour to suit the person I was with, what is shocking is that I used to pride myself in this thinking this was the best way to get on in life. This is basically what your Customer Services workshop was asking you to do, instead of being you and offering the true you to all your customers. It is an insidious and draining way of being and the crazy thing is that customers can see through this and feel the falsity of it.

  13. “I have learned to connect to me, to feel the true me and to express from there”. What a beautiful and powerful lesson that you have shared with us Carmen; as you say without perfection and with ‘wobbles’ but with purpose and commitment. I love the appreciation you have for Serge Benhayon and now yourself.

  14. This is cool, I was teaching a class I didn’t know the other day and could feel all the behaviours that kids can go into when it is not their regular teacher. I could initially feel my body go into anxiety because of what was before me, but I observed this, pulled up and addressed what was needed with the kids but didn’t go into the ‘game’ or ‘battle’ with them and held myself in the situation. It was amazing to then feel the kids settle. A teaching assistant commented that this was the calmest they had seen the class. I found because I stayed steady within myself I was more able to see what was going on, what the kids needed and respond without reaction.

    1. And you connected to them Kristy and wasn’t separate from them because they weren’t ‘your class’ or you weren’t their Teacher. I wonder if that’s why historically in schools students play up with substitute Teachers, because its how the Teacher approaches the class and how the students are about not having their regular Teacher there.

  15. How beautiful to feel the true Carmin, thank you for sharing you coming back to the true you. I lived in the empty world of playing roles especially the good and the nice, being what I thought people wanted. There was no sense of a true me until I came to feel the deep love and equality reflected by Serge and know that same love lived within me also. No need to be anybody else but me.

  16. Lovely to read this Carmin. My days of feeling like a shape shifting amoeba, constantly adjusting and fitting in with what I thought was needed are over. it was exhausting and not the true me. Through attending Workshops run by Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine I have found life and relationships are much more joyful when we connect to ourselves and live who we are.

  17. Beautifull how you no longer pander to anyone. Your blog made me reflect and see how I have changed. I used to be the joker or be/act a specific way so people would feel comfortable with me and I used to always feel contracted around my heart – because I felt I could not truly let go and be me and had to be ‘someone’ else around others. I deeply appreciate this contraction is now barely there at all and instead, with the love, reflection and support of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine I am feeling more and more comfortable within my own skin and just being me.

  18. Such a simple but important sharing as in life we can forgo the quality in our connections and make it about getting things done- when it is the quality that makes the difference to others.

  19. Sure Carmine, when we are just copying others behavior in fact we are avoiding to be our real selves and, if we become more aware of what we then bring to the other person we can come to the understanding that there is another responsibility in life and that is energetic responsibility. This tells us that everything matters as it either heals or hurts and when we look to the first example where we tend to react to the behaviors of others, we definitely have to admit that we do not heal, but actually add to the hurt we all carry with us from living this separated way of living.

  20. So great to read this again and really appreciate the questions it has brought up for me. ”What is the reflection others get when we are not ourselves but instead mirroring who they appear to be?’ When someone comes from their solid connection to themselves it can be felt, every movement, look, word has the truth of lived experience but if we are not bringing this then what or who is? Everything either heals or harms and being true to who we are no matter where we are or when it is – energetic responsibility is being lived.

  21. Beautiful picture Carmin – so full of the real you. I’ve been a chameleon in life, actually quite proud of my ‘ability’ to connect with anyone and everyone where they are at. I used to think it was a great thing and that I could ‘keep the peace’ wherever I went. But if this is done in a way that denies our true self then we are just actors playing roles and not bringing anything true to relationships. The experience of simply being myself is by comparison delightful. What a blessing your customers get when they see you today.

  22. Me too Carmine, I have been that Chameleon too for most of my life, rather than holding a line as being myself, which is an amazing thing to be experiencing instead, or at least to observe in what situations am I drawn back into those ways.

  23. Raises the question if we wanna meet another where we are at or as who we truly are, ie essence to essence? That´s some of the magic I learned with Universal Medicine, that we can see and meet a person by addressing and connecting to their essence, the core of their being, even when they themselves are not connected to it but play out taken on and learned behaviours. But we can only really do that when we are connected with our innermost to the best of our ability; then our essence is felt by the other person and invites them to resonate, ie to allow their essence to be activated as well.

  24. Being who we are is the greatest reflection we can give another and it is “…a true way that supports not only me but everyone who walks through my door.”

  25. How gorgeous Carmin that the patients who visit you get the true, loving, tender and wise you and not the ‘mimic’. How important it is that we all express who we so naturally are; what you have expressed here is real, true and loving;
    “I have learned to connect to me, to feel the true me and to express from there (without perfection, as I still have ‘wobbles’).

  26. I love the fact that in every moment shared with another we have the opportunity to reflect the true us to them; not in a judgmental way as if we consider them to be lesser than us, but in a way that they can feel that there is another way to be with the choice to accept this always being theirs and theirs alone. We never know when someone will be inspired by us so it is up to us to live the fullness of who we are in every single moment.

  27. Like you Carmin I am learning to deepen the connection with myself and express fully from that space; there is a freeing and expansion that is felt when this happens. I love coming back to your blog as it is such a beautiful gentle reminder to respond from what is simply felt in the body.

  28. What you are sharing here Carmin is exactly how I used to live in all areas of my life. I was like a shape shifting amoeba constantly changing to fit in with what I thought everyone needed and I was good at it. I was exhausted from it too and all the while I was trying, no one got to meet the real me. Thanks to meeting Serge Benhayon who was and is a huge inspiration, this has been disappearing as the real me emerges and boy does that feel lovely within my body and my life.

  29. It sure is exhausting playing roles that are not our true selves, the fact so many of us do this and actually feel completely empty and out of touch with the essence that lies burning inside is deeply sad when you really feel it. Devastating is probably a better adjective. How wonderful then that we now have been presented with many tools to assist in reconnecting to that divine spark within and how to just be and live that in all interactions. Very cool.

  30. I recently realised I was doing this at work, I had done it throughout the years but wasn’t as conscious of it as I have been lately and that is that I will race around or being a little louder or be jumping up to do this or that to show others around me that are doing the same thing that ‘see I’m busy just like you’. Where this came from was a belief that if I didn’t act the same then it would look like I wasn’t busy or being ‘efficient’. Crazy hey, how can it be efficient to race around from this to that? Efficiency has everything to do with presence and the quality we are in… that is what has been glaringly obvious to me for some time now and especially with training others. Without this we are just acting ‘efficiently’ but being left exhausted because it takes so much energy to look the part instead of just being ourselves.

  31. To work and move gently throughout your day in presence, honouring what you feel in every moment and expressing from there is a truly beautiful and inspiring way to move through life. This is a reflection that is sorely missed in the world and one that is desperately needed.

  32. When we try to please others it is so exhausting! When we truly make it about love and by this I mean loving ourselves first and giving ourselves the space to just be it automatically gives another permission to do the same. Serge Benhayon is truly inspiring on so very many levels and this is just one of them ‘He never tries to be ‘nice’ or ‘polite’ or play social games. He is just himself, consistently – he ‘breathes his own breath’ and never holds back his truth and love.’ From knowing and observing Serge I know much can be learnt and healed purely on what another is reflecting from their livingness.

  33. I know I have been really convinced that meeting where people were at was the best thing to do, to have an entrance to a relationship the way I wanted it to be ( me in control).When I think about this it is actually manipulating, to mould someone to be safe myself. What a difference with being myself, expressing me, opening up to people not wanting anything from them.

  34. work of course should physically tire us – that is natural and indicative that one has dedicated their all. However, never should it deplete us or exhaust us – for that indicates that we have absorbed that which is not ours to absorb. This is the key to true vitality.

  35. “At the end of every working day I was exhausted. Not because of the physical aspects of my job, but because of the energy I put into being what I thought everyone wanted me to be, and my constant measuring of everyone else.” – This is such a key revelation! How often have we blamed work for making us tired rather than being willing to see the WAY in which we were working and how this could have been energetically draining us… In my experience there is a difference between feeling energetically drained and physically tired…

  36. I like what you are sharing here Carmin, as it is something so many of us deem normal, to adapt to the situation at hand and act accordingly. It is really like being an actor all the time never allowing oneself to just be. But there is another way and it is ok and actual very normal to just be ourselves and live from there.

  37. Carmen what you have so beautifully expressed here is that it is our quality shared and the essence of who we are within that when connected too allows us to move in a way that not only supports us and revitalises us but also holds all others equally in that too. An amazing way to live and shows the level of responsibility we hold from the quality of energy we express in.

  38. We can see why the world is so exhausted when you consider the amount of energy that is going into a simple hello! I saw a man this weekend who was sharing how he had come to accept himself as enough and because this was the truth and not an ideal of what he wanted to be true it was immensely healing to feel and experience. Being ourselves is so powerful.

  39. Ahhh… “meeting each person where they were at” – I can so relate to that. Feeling their pain, pandering to their needs, I thought I was offering them support. But really, who is meeting who? “I” (for the lack of a better word) was not present to meet anyone.

  40. Being able to hold everyone as equals, being open and loving with everyone no matter who they are really comes from the relationship we have with ourselves. Sure, the expression may change from person to person, but if we hold ourselves as divine and precious it is almost automatically the same to those around us.

  41. Such a great point Carmin about mimicking and conforming. That is just the best example of why we should just be who we are. Because others actually need us to be us, even if it is confronting as sometimes it will be. I know for sure I would feel inspired by anyone who is just being themselves and not pandering to anyone. And how much healthier is it to just live our lives without squashing ourselves to fit.

  42. Being ourselves, living who we naturally are feeds us back – being who we truly are means the truth we live is a living truth, present with us all the time.

  43. You being you would already be a healing for anyone’s eyes before they even received your optometry treatment.

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