To honour our tenderness

by Rebecca Poole, Brisbane, Australia

Why do people say “Grow some balls”? Balls are weak and sensitive! If you really want to get tough, grow a vagina! Those things take a pounding! – Betty White

On one hand this is quite funny, and we laugh because it shows the ridiculousness of our world and the way we see ourselves, and possibly . . . if we didn’t laugh we would be crying.What this quote really exposes about our society is that we are championing toughness, and that we are in a constant battle of the sexes. Who can say that as a little kid they didn’t feel these two legacies of our current society thrust upon them? I know for myself as a young girl I thought that the tougher I could be and the more I could beat boys at anything I did, the better and more awesome I was. But what about the little boy who also has the pressure to be tougher? What about the shame of being beaten by a girl? Doesn’t this create resentment towards women at such a young age? We can’t pretend that this doesn’t happen or downplay its importance – it is everywhere. Is this just harmless banter between the sexes, or does it create a more insidious erosion of male – female relationships and a loss of a more feminine way in our society? What if it was normal for us to be told “Find some curves”, and it meant “Where is your tenderness?” If the world had more tenderness instead of the toughness that it is championing then maybe, just maybe, we as a whole humanity would be uncompromisingly sensitive to the welfare of our fellow brothers and sisters in the world. There is no way that abuse, aggression, violence and corruption of any kind would be tolerated if tenderness was one of the characteristics that was totally honoured in our world. What if we asked the world – Men, Women and Children – to re-develop their tenderness? I ask again, how different would the world be?

578 thoughts on “To honour our tenderness

  1. Perfect blog to read today. This blog invites me to express and move in a way that honours my tenderness to a whole new level.

  2. I work with people who are ill and the common thread amongst people who are ill is that they want to be treated with tenderness and care. I would now say that one of the main reasons we become ill in the first place is because we do not treat ourselves with enough tenderness and that this causes a dis-ease within us.

  3. With tenderness and sensitivity there is a knowing of who we are, intimacy in being with each other, care, compassion, connection – surely a different world.

  4. Growing up, I knew I had to be strong, and I thought being strong meant being tough and hard. Even though some fairy tales would tell me that the true strength was found in being gentle, somehow I thought it was only in the story – probably because everyone around me seemed to be striving to be strong by being tough, and I was quite surprised to realise that I was actually tender in my true essence when I started to reconnect with myself through Universal Medicine.

  5. If as young boys and girls we were asked to be our tender gentle selves then we would not have the separation that exists now between the sexes as we would see each other as the same, expressing in our own unique qualities. Living with all men, I have seen how upset they have become when girls and boys are treated so differently especially at school. It’s so important for us all to individually feel how we add to the separation.

  6. Find some curves. I love that quote.
    We put everything upside down. We made things normal which shouldn’t be our normal if we use our common sense. We let ourselves getting mislead by forces around us. Very much time to re- claim ourselves. Serge Benhayon is a great lead in this and we all can be.

  7. Yes if tenderness was the benchmark within society anything less than this would simply not be allowed to continue. Also a tender world cannot be written off as some kind of fantasy utopia given that if one can choose to be tender then many if not all can. Perhaps the ‘utopia thinking’ is simply a way to avoid taking responsibility for the choices we are making on a daily basis.

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