Writing about appreciation seems to bring up a lot for me. Today after weeks of delay, I asked myself, “Why is this so hard?” I am pretty good at clocking the beauty that surrounds us all – the sun, the sky and the stars. I know I am blessed to have a job, family, wonderful partner and an incredible group of friends. Many times I have been in awe of the way incredible opportunities have opened up, or of the colours of the sky during sunrise or sunset. When I speak to people I find it easy to tell them how much I appreciate them, the way they light up my life and what they bring to the world, – I do it often. Last and certainly not least, I’ve had more things to appreciate than I would have thought possible since I discovered Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine around seven years ago. So seriously, what’s the problem?
I’ve been on the ‘missing list’ for the majority of my life. Along with a lot of other ‘missing’ folk.
And the truth is, I have really missed me not being around.
I, like so many others, had access to a knowingness as a child of how we could and should be. I was aware of it from an early age. I didn’t speak often but when I did, it was for all.
I was born and grew up in Australia and can say that as a culture and race of people, we have pretty much mastered the art of avoiding appreciation. This is kind of funny really because there is so much to appreciate about Australia, our culture and landscape. There are so many awesome and amazing people that I have met and been privileged to know in Australia!
However, it appears to me that many habitual aspects of our language and ways of interacting with each other can block truly appreciating one another.
What is appreciation, really?
I recently pondered on this and realised my understanding of appreciation was quite shallow – based on either material gain, pictures of success and/or pandering to please and keep others and myself happy. Examples of things I have ‘appreciated’ from this perspective include: Continue reading “Peeling Back the Layers of Appreciation”
Recently I had a wonderful lesson presented to me on value and the wealth inherent in appreciation.
Someone recently completed a task for me that simplified my day no end.
It wasn’t part of their job but they had noticed I was having some difficulty with it, they knew how to do it and offered to finish it. In what seemed like no time at all they sent an email letting me know it was done. I was touched that they had taken the time in their busy day to support me so swiftly.
I started to dash off a thank you in reply – “You are a treasure.” I was just about to press send and I stopped. It didn’t feel right, it felt like just a throwaway line, an automatic response, empty; what we usually say without thinking. In effect, not truly valuing or appreciating them.
We are moving to our new house in a few weeks, so this particular Sunday morning I had committed to getting started with some packing. I was halfway through the first box when I had a strong impulse to go and wash my new car so – box abandoned with slight feelings of guilt – outside I went with my favourite car washing cloths.
Over the past year I experienced a couple of difficult conflict situations. I didn’t handle either of them well, going into reaction without reading what was truly being offered for me to understand life at a deeper level. I collapsed in a heap both times, taking things very personally.
Those around me looked on. I felt guilty that I was unable to reflect to them a way of being that was inspiring. I wasn’t strong, steady or rational. In fact, I felt quite the opposite.
The guilt around this has for a long time preoccupied me, until just recently when I realised something very important.