This morning, as I was walking along the beach with my husband and we were having a deep discussion about our relationship, I noticed that I kept my hands in my pockets and was feeling quite tense and reactive.
I then made a conscious choice to take my hands out of my pockets. I allowed them to swing with my body as I walked and was surprised to feel the tension leave my body – I could feel the calming rhythm of my walk. From that place I was able to express more openly and honestly with my husband and our walk became more harmonious. Continue reading “Walking Life with my Hands in my Pockets”
Have you ever noticed how couples who have broken up often continue to behave and fight the way they did while married? Even for years or decades after separating or divorcing?
The same could be said for siblings, friends, teachers, students, workmates and business contacts who come into conflict and part company because of it. Or even public figures like politicians and celebrities who we choose to dislike for whatever reason. Sometimes the participants (even the unwitting ones) in these conflicted relationships who have moved apart may not even communicate directly at all, but the hostility, jealousy, frustration, judgment, etc., goes on and on within each person… like a festering splinter… Continue reading “We’re All Married to Everyone”
While we would never want to admit it, conditional love is very much the predominant expression of love in the world today. It is something we have accepted as close enough to love and therefore we have begun to accept, and even expect, this type of love time and time again.
So what is conditional love?
Conditional love has many layers and many forms, all of them designed to show the world just enough of our true self (our essence) so we don’t appear soulless, but not enough that other people might freak out, run away or point and say, ”You’re different,” “We don’t like you” etc.
Conditional love is the voice that says, “Don’t shine quite so bright, don’t say what you actually feel, don’t step on toes.” It is also the voice that says, “You’re better to wallow in your woes, because when you wallow, others leave you alone or give you attention and sympathy.”
Continue reading “Trapped in Conditional Love”
What would it mean to not be dominated by hurt? What would it feel like to not react when abused, blamed or targetted in some way? What would it feel like to give power back to love?
A little while ago now I started an autopsy on ‘hurt’ to find out what it was really all about. I was tired of reacting and feeling emotional, I was tired of the upset and the inner discomfort, and I was tired of wasting days stressed and behaving in a way that was intense for myself and those around me.
Of course when another person is choosing to be loving, there is nothing here to trigger me to react and because of this, it is easy to respond in kind. Continue reading “Giving Power back to Love: Making the Choice to not be Dominated by Hurt”
by Francis Tybislawski, Brisbane, Australia
I attended a Universal Medicine presentation recently, hosted by Serge Benhayon, where there was discussion about how men interact with each other, and the types of conversations they have. In general men are very good at talking or interacting in a certain way and about certain subjects. It is very easy for us to discuss technical things, how things work, how we build things, how we make things work, and what we do for a living. We can discuss sport for hours on end and we discuss things at home, but often in a clinical and structured way. We may venture into how certain things feel, but it is often from a competitive angle. In some ways many conversations are competitive, always proving (or trying to) that our lives are better than other men’s lives, the things we own or have are better than somebody else’s. We use our assets to prove we are doing fine, that our lifestyle is great and consistently growing better.
What we don’t often do is communicate at the human level, about feelings and emotions, in an open and personal way. Continue reading “Not the typical man-to-man conversation”