Table Captain!

A few months ago I attended a family wedding. It was a beautiful occasion with great attention to detail. One aspect that supported this was the appointment of table captains, the idea being that one person would attend to the needs of their fellow guests and ensure that everything was running smoothly at each table.

Flag saying 'table captain' attached to the top part of a chair

Personally, being a table captain was interesting. As someone who has been used to taking a back seat and letting things happen, being appointed to the captain’s role required quite a change in my approach. No longer could I just let the event wash over me, I had to be attentive to the needs of the other guests and be engaged in the process of ensuring things were running smoothly.

It made me reflect on my wider participation in life, how each moment I can be that table captain, taking responsibility for how others are, tending to the needs of people around us: not at the expense of our own wellbeing of course, but definitely there is an exquisite opportunity to care for and be proactively in the service of others. Or to put it another way, “get ourselves out of the way,” a term I first heard described by Serge Benhayon.

I also considered how the more I take on the role of table captain in my life, the less anxiousness takes hold as the presence we feel in ourselves becomes stronger. A perfect example of this arises in daily meetings. If I go into a meeting knowing I am not the chair or not the lead on a project, do I sit back and say, “Well, that person is leading, what are they going to come up with?” or do I play my table captain role and see myself as equally responsible for what unfolds, regardless of the picture of what my role is, not being the appointed ‘leader.’

In such a scenario, when I have taken responsibility, my energy levels and enjoyment have both skyrocketed, and I have felt the positive impact I have had on those around me.

This scenario could be related to any aspect of life and the wider societies we all live in. Do we say, “That’s someone else’s job,” or “Can’t someone else do it?” or do we initiate, take the lead, set the example, make things happen, and stand up for it when we know something is corrupt, not true, or just needs doing?

And if we are someone who is used to leading, the opposite can be true. We can provide support to others to take the lead – a table captain gently inspiring others to be captains too. The most beautiful thing about being the table captain is that we are tending to the needs of others, yet we are nourished deeply from the way we then allow ourselves to naturally be.

By Stephen

Related Reading:
Being Responsible for the Life I Live
Change your life
Serge Benhayon – the universal man

641 thoughts on “Table Captain!

  1. Thank you Stephen, what a way to understand our life as most just want to take a back seat when the truth is we can all be more responsive in every situation so that life become a full-fill-ment of our natural resources through our most divine connection to our essences / ❤️ Inner Hearts.

  2. I love that you took the opportunity here to take the lead and then saw how you could change this in all areas of your life. I also love what you share here as it brings it back to equality ‘And if we are someone who is used to leading, the opposite can be true. We can provide support to others to take the lead’.

  3. How different would the world be if we were all table captains? All acting with care and sensitivity to each other, and feeling the purpose to bring our all? Thanks Stephen for sharing your experience, it’s a great concept that applies to life. How often do we all just sit back and let others take care of things, when we are all equally capable of contributing and taking the lead when called to?

  4. I remember when I was at infant school I was asked to be a dinner monitor, the same as being a Table Captain. At the dinner table I was responsible to make sure everyone had something to eat and there was plenty of water, to ensure that everyone behaved at the table, no rowdiness or rudeness, to make sure that everyone took their plates away and that the table was clean and tidy for the next sitting. It gave everyone a sense of responsibility and to work as a team. The system worked very well and looking back it was a way to set standards of acceptable behaviour which is sadly lacking today.

  5. Thank you Stephen as what you have shared gives the feeling of how much appreciation you have for yourself and others, and to appreciate is understanding of how divinity comes through us all equally.

  6. “If I go into a meeting knowing I am not the chair or not the lead on a project, do I sit back and say, “Well, that person is leading, what are they going to come up with?” We all have a seat at the table of life and an equal share in the responsibility to enrich the conversation for all.

  7. When somebody sees our potential, we have the potential to see it too. Many people grow up in households full of critique, judgement and abuse – how do we expect our children to be bright and decent when they have never been taught that way of being?

    1. As appreciation of our divinity offers so much, when we understand that connection and then energetically appreciate what we bring with the most Loving authority, this is confirming us and thus setting us on the path of True-purpose.

  8. When the naughty kid gets given responsibility, they often shine bright. When we show people that we trust them and we see their potential, they have an opportunity to fill their boots and walk in them. When we are constantly criticising and picking faults, that is what others feel from us too & the response can be expected.

    1. Absolutely Viktoria, appreciating our ability to step up and into a situation is a deepening of our connection to our essences and thus we are able to “shine bright.”

    2. Thanks Viktoria, great comment. Criticism and fault finding is rife, we so often see what someone is weak at instead of seeing the potential. Criticism is so common in conversation too, but we rarely hear the word “potential” about people, and not usually about their being but if it’s mentioned it’s normally about skills.

      1. So if we took this to be true then how would our work and role be with children and young people? It would be about meeting and connecting with them no matter what and giving them responsibility and opportunities to shine brightly ✨

      2. As a society we are much more at ease criticizing and finding fault with each other I remember as a child being told that if you don’t have something positive to say to another then don’t say it. We very rarely praise people for just being themselves. I have noticed when we do praise children especially they seem to grow taller and gain confidence, surely this is what we should be encouraging children to be confident about their place in the world.

      3. It is a great foundation for children to confirm who they are and appreciate and nurture their inner qualities. So many of us as adults didn’t receive that and are not just unaware of what we bring from the essence of who we are, and we are super awkward with receiving any confirmation as we don’t often know what to do with it. We could as a human race establish appreciating one another for who we are as a standard, and instead of criticising we could gently point out what’s not true in someone’s behaviour or expression from a foundation of knowing and holding the true essence of the person.

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