Healing the Energy of Terror

Over the last couple of months I have been dealing with a situation at work that recently began to intensify over a two-week period. Except for a chat with a good friend, I hadn’t spoken of this situation with anyone as I felt there was something significant going on and that going into conversation about it would draw me away from what this teaching was bringing for me.

I felt I had to stay focussed on the energy at play without diluting it and so creating a distraction.

It all came to a head quite suddenly, and I got smashed. Instead of staying with the bigger picture and observing as I had been doing, I was taking on everything coming at me. I felt my body going into the familiar ‘fight or flight’ mode with no escape – my reaction was instant and in-built, leaving no room for handling the situation in any other way. This in turn sent me into feeling the victim because that was my old accustomed pattern.

Since then however, I have noted that there was something different about the old pattern – about me, about the way in which I held myself in this oh so familiar energy of attack – that didn’t feel right anymore. It was as if a small part of my body had sidestepped the force of the attack and had not gone into immediate self-defence. I felt this in the way my body did not collapse in on itself as it were, allowing the energy to wreak its havoc; my whole body did not succumb and cower.

And, profoundly, I did not match the energy coming at me with a reaction of my own version of attack, as I would have done in the past.

I felt how I didn’t absorb the attack as deeply and, as I was going through the attack, I was present enough to understand that I was choosing to absorb the situation and the negative energy and not simply observe it.

As it blew over, I was able to extricate myself from the effects much quicker and so come back to myself, back to my centre, in a shorter period of time.

After I had spent a few days picking myself up off the floor, coming out of my stupor and recovering myself, there was space to allow for reflection, understanding, and moving back into the bigger picture.

Preparing for my forthcoming meeting with the company MD (managing director) and still holding on to the last vestiges of victimhood, I had composed in advance my list of all the points I wanted to make. These points clearly showed me in the better, ‘right’ light and my manager in the opposite.

Having made my list, I met with the MD without it.

In the lead up to our meeting, I had felt myself move into a space of clarity and grace, and as we met I had a deep understanding of why I did not need my list.

Words at this point were obsolete. All that mattered was the energy. I didn’t need to try to explain or get anyone on my side. The energy of the interaction between my manager and myself ‘spoke’ for itself and I simply needed to let it be felt.

I had an expansive knowing that not only could I feel the energy of what had taken place, but that everyone else could too. There was no need to go back into that energy and try to protect and justify myself. Very few words were needed and it was one of the most healing interactions I have ever experienced.

In that moment, coming to this realisation allowed me to step across the threshold from being a victim to being a woman who sees I have another choice: a woman who sees I have the choice of remaining the victim or of stepping into my true power and taking responsibility for my choices in the past that have brought me to this point. That, moment by moment, I have the option to choose again and to perhaps, this time, choose differently.


I was on my usual weekend walk along the river this morning, feeling, enjoying and appreciating the love and clarity that I had gained from this experience. In doing so, I was opening up space… space for an even greater healing to take place – the healing of the energy of terror.

The terror that I had taken on and stored in my body as a child every time I went through a similar confrontation with my mother.

Years and years and years of it.

You see, these energetic attacks, such as the one I recently experienced, were no stranger to me – I had been on the receiving end of such attacks since early childhood when an attack from a person of authority would come unexpected, uninvited and seemingly out of the blue. The coping mechanism I had developed in childhood as a means of survival I carried with me into adulthood.

As a victim, I was always on the back foot, always in protective mode… fighting these energies of attack with my own version of attacking back and so unwittingly leaving myself open to more attack.

Encountering this energetic attack at work brought to the surface the terrifying tension I lived with throughout my childhood, of never knowing when a similar attack would come, or from where.

As I walked I allowed myself to feel the full weight of this terror in my body, how destructive it had been and the layers of protection I had built to try to protect myself from it.

I also allowed myself to feel the lifetime(s) when I had inflicted this energy of terror on others. I was able to observe myself feeling this two-sided terror in such a way that it did not cripple me; it did not draw a single tear. Just an awe of the enormity of it and the many layers of how it had taken hold.

I felt both how my body had had to adapt in an unnatural way to store this energy, and the exhausting amount of energy it took to keep it there.

And I chose on my walk this morning to let the energy of terror go. (It was a very long walk!)

I could feel my body changing as I released this energy of terror. I could feel the appreciation of every single cell in my body for my decision to finally free each cell from the grip this energy of terror had had on them all these years.

This was felt in a joyous tingling, a lightly flowing current of movement throughout my whole body, like my cells were dancing in all the space that was opening up for them.

A miracle happened on my walk this morning – a miracle that could take place through the grace and support I have found in being a student of The Way of The Livingness.

The way I now live, based on the teachings of Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon’s presentations on The Way of The Livingness, supported me to observe, to feel and to finally let go of an intimidating energy that had held me in its grip for my entire life.

B.E. – Seeker of Truth, worldly woman, student extraordinaire of The Way of The Livingness

Related Reading:
Responsibility in the Workplace
Energetic Integrity and Energetic Responsibility

722 thoughts on “Healing the Energy of Terror

  1. “I was choosing to absorb the situation and the negative energy and not simply observe it” – What you’ve shared could really change our relationship to stressful or frightening situations. You’ve emphasised that we’re always still able to make a choice of whether we get entrenched in an issue or a certain type of energy or observe what’s going on with UNDERSTANDING. Understanding is key to allowing things to happen as they will, staying with ourselves but also deconstructing any issues that have arisen.

  2. Yes, in a moment of confrontation we may not manage to stay completely connected, but thereafter there is much we can do to bring ourselves back to the love we know, and if we do not have self-judgment in any way, from there the learning process can commence.

  3. ‘I had composed in advance my list of all the points I wanted to make.’ – Well observed, in righteousness our actions come from our mind and not from our heart.

  4. I have just had a situation where I could feel the set up of lots of things going wrong and every which way I turned, there was another obstacle.It was getting me to hate the systems I was using ( lots of things happening ending with the bank was about to lock down my account but I needed to transfer some money) the frustration of the complication and the terror of everything going uncontrollably wrong. Once I let go of the emotions and went to purpose, it all started to flow very differently.

  5. The energy of terror is pernicious and lodges deep within the body – the timing, direction and precise nature of an attack is never known beforehand but the preparedness and expectation lead to hyper-vigilance and stress hormones continually circulating through the body. It is as though the adrenaline leaves skid mark in the system and it can be felt years and decades later.

  6. This a great example of when we not only observe what has just occurred and the effect we feel from it, that is the hurt that we feel, but being willing to go deeper and look to the root cause of the hurt which is often been something that has effected us as a child and have buried because at the time we felt not able to deal with it, but now the opportunity has come up once again and this time there is a willingness to understand why and choose to ‘go there’ feel the hurt and to let it go. This process is the beginning of a true healing for ourselves.

  7. This blog just goes to show that we are never ‘broken’ or a ‘broken soul’ as some might call it, but simply impacted by hurts that we can in fact clear in any moment through how we move and choose to live going forward.

  8. Coming back to this blog after a similar attack helped me to see just how even though I read the situation and claimed my truth of the matter without contracting, I still absorbed a lot of the energy of the attack as there were mistruths and fabrications hurled at me after I had brought to the light something that person did not want to take responsibility for. What I realise now is that whenever I go into any justification with others to try to tell ‘my side of the story’ and be considered right I then lose any authority I may have claimed and fall into the trap of being a victim instead of letting go of judgement through greater understanding.

  9. In my experience, protecting ourselves from attacks and forces at play only keeps us in protection. To fight we have to either have a guard up or our weapons out – neither of which are the truth of who we are. When we read what is happening, an attack may still hurt but it doesn’t grab us, nor do we absorb it, to the extent we do when turning a blind eye. Reading and seeing what is going on is our best “protection”.

  10. Once we start to talk about this kind of thing in terms of energy, it makes it so much easier to separate the emotion out of the equation. Whilst we are emotional we will never see the wood from the trees and never get to the root cause of any issue. So this is a brilliant blog and really supportive in opening us all up to a new way of looking at what has happened, and is happening in our lives. Thank you for sharing.

    1. I agree – a truly educational blog, bringing realness to an area that most people find difficult, which is how to deal with our long term and deeply rooted emotions.

      1. And let’s be honest, we need a new way – because a cursory glance at the state of our health shows us, very starkly, that the current way isn’t ‘working’

  11. ‘I felt both how my body had had to adapt in an unnatural way to store this energy, and the exhausting amount of energy it took to keep it there.’ – A super important observation, the amount of energy we spend on age old behaviours is enormous and is weighing us down big time.

  12. It is our mind that goes to town when there is time to wallow over an attack. The ‘what if’ paints darker and darker pictures and at some point, we totally lose the original issue and only see the monster we have created. When we re-learn to feel the energy behind them, we know the real source of the attack, and it allows us, the observer and not react.

  13. ‘After I had spent a few days picking myself up off the floor, coming out of my stupor and recovering myself, there was space to allow for reflection, understanding, and moving back into the bigger picture.’ and so is our process of learning in life – not always from a crash moment or being forced to learn but in every moment we are offered reflected and the opportunity to deeply consider our choices.

  14. I wanted to let you know B.E. how inspiring this blog has been for me. When I have been on my walks, and have felt a tension or disease in my body, I have been allowing myself to feel what is there in my body to be felt. It’s a bit hard to put into words, but what has happened is that I feel the energy in my body, and I can feel the shape of my body change, like if I feel the anger that is there, I start to change the way I moved as the anger moves and shapes my body. I allowed myself to feel it, talked through it with myself and then let it go. The anger leaves. It is a fascinating exercise of allowing myself to truly feel what is there, feeling it and letting it go, whilst staying with me in the process.

  15. ” I did not match the energy coming at me with a reaction of my own version of attack, as I would have done in the past.” this is profound and life changing and makes all the difference to our lives allowing true healing flow and understanding in our lives.

  16. Gosh don’t we just go on and on expanding if we can get passed the energy of terror. It seems that we have all experienced PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) to a degree too, from all the aeons that terror has got the better of us. Not that long ago I realised that ‘shock and trauma’ were a part of daily life for me. I am sure that there are many things that I have yet to learn to not give in to yet about terror, but I am starting to realise just how much control over me it has had, and I don’t want that anymore.

  17. I was recently supporting someone experiencing extreme fear and as she came back to herself she said she recognised that she always has a silence in her own body no matter what is going on around her, that she can choose to return to, and we celebrated her wise words.

  18. ‘And, profoundly, I did not match the energy coming at me with a reaction of my own version of attack, as I would have done in the past.’ this too is protection. True expression in response to what happens in life is what is required.

  19. I love it when our body gives us feedback that something has changed in an old pattern or behaviour. Even though we may seem to have gone ‘boots and all’ into an old pattern, the feeling from the body lets us know that we are not at the same point as we used to be when we were invested in that reaction. We get to feel that it doesn’t work or that it doesn’t belong with who we are and how we respond to life now.

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