What’s in a Hug?

Recently during an esoteric yoga class, the yoga teacher talked of the love from our hearts coming down our arms and coming out of our hands. When she spoke of this, all I could see was myself hugging another.

I never used to be much of a hugger. I didn’t offer hugs nor did I make myself available for another to hug me. I was never a fan of those awkward quick hugs with a pat on the back – they were a gesture that only highlighted what was not there.

I preferred no hug than a lesser hug and I held myself back so much that a full hug was a rarity.

There can be such intimacy in a hug and I really felt what this was when I felt the love in my heart and its movement out of my hands.

When we hug another, our hearts are all but touching. We then use our arms (that are full of love) to embrace each other. Often our hands will rest on the back of the other person, and for me, my hand will rest on the back of their heart.

So, to reiterate – when we hug, our hearts are touching, you are held in my love-filled arms and this circle of love is sealed with my hands resting on the back of your heart.

I am now a hugger and have a much deeper appreciation of what is in a hug.

By Nikki McKee, Company Director, Goonellabah, NSW, Australia

Further Reading:
The inner-heart – your key to connecting with who you truly are
From Hardness to Heartfelt – Hugs with My Dad
A Tender Hug… Reflecting the Love That I Am

1,087 thoughts on “What’s in a Hug?

  1. I’ve been noticing lately how much is there to be felt in a hug. They give so much away and you can’t hide in a hug.

    1. So true Nikki. There have been many times when I have felt the quality in my body in relation to the person I’m hugging and have been shocked at how hard I have felt. The beautiful thing though is that I can then choose to be inspired and let go the hardness and surrender into myself so my body just melts.

  2. It is not so much the hug but the quality in which we are with another, and whether we are closed or open.
    A hug can be a movement in protection and hardness as equally a love-filled movement that holds another in the love we are.

  3. Having just done a healing course, Level 1, what I was struck by most was how amazing it is to connect to another human being from our essence and energetic quality, the power in this is beyond words but shows me that their is a quality of interacting that is connecting and another way that is basically the opposite, unfortunately most of us live in the very numbed out disconnected way so that when you hug it is without any true intimacy or love. We have so much inside of us just bursting to come out and be loving in ways I can’t even imagine, there is so much more to life than what we currently are living.

    1. That’s so true Vanessa, even when we are living in the love of our essence there are more depths of love to go to – it’s never ending.

  4. This is gorgeous in its simplicity and profoundness. It is incredible what you become aware of when asked to feel your heart and the flow of love from there down your arms. Most often this expands through this awareness or blockages disappear. It feels so important to bring this openness to a hug rather than the hard, protected bodies we normally have. Lately I have spontaneously been enjoying hugging myself, which feels so nurturing. We can tend to focus so much on loving outwardly, that it is beautiful when you feel to hug yourself.

    1. Thank you for the reminder to hug me. Who needs an outward fix like a snack when there is a loving embrace in our arms and hands all the time waiting to support us to connect to the loving truth of who we are.

  5. Thank you Nikki, I can feel a new level of appreciation for what a hug can hold, and to value even more deeply the love I can share and that we all are in essence.

  6. A hug is another one of our many movements made in life and the quality for which we move plays an integral role in a hug, just as much as it does to pick up a hairbrush. What I also find cool to note is how we grow and shift in our lives to how we feel about ourselves shifts and changes our movements too. Our hugs can deepen and shift as we do. Movement is very cool to observe and explore within ourselves because we can open up to more love and honesty from these observations.

  7. It’s beautiful how we don’t have to try to love – it’s just something that naturally emanates from us when we are truly connected with ourselves… And so a hug can be a meeting of that love, a joyful expression of what is already there.

  8. So often a hug is co-opted into the diminishing task of a polite convention, a way of bringing an exchange to an end or starting it off. Like any other movement’s action in life, if there is not love a hug is a purposeless event.

  9. A true hug can heal the countless fake hugs that we may have received or given – that is our responsibility. I’m blessed with delicious long arms and I love wrapping them right round people!

  10. There is nothing better than a hug that is full of Love, no need from the other person nor you, just an equalness and the joy of being how we are with each other. This kind of hug is one that melts us all to be all of who we are. Keep them coming is all I can say!

  11. When there is an open hug full of love, it is truly felt there is an equalness of joy and true connection. There is no need or expectation, it is a hug that melts us and we can feel the deep connection.

  12. There is a lot that can be communicated to another through a hug, people can hug and let one another in with no holding back, or it maybe a physical act that at the same time is hard, unloving and protective.

  13. A hug is such a beautiful simple movement and when given with quality, love and truth two people connect in such a divine way, a blessing for both.

  14. A lot can be understood about each other from the way we hug and it is lovely to feel when our guards melt because that then allows the other to also melt. Hugs get really warm and lovely at that point without our guards.

  15. ‘when we hug, our hearts are touching, you are held in my love-filled arms and this circle of love is sealed with my hands resting on the back of your heart.’ Beautiful expressed Nikki.

  16. Hugging was never a part of culture where I grew up and it felt really awkward when I first moved to live in England. Over the years, people started to mimic what they saw on TV/films and hugging started to sneak in a little. It’s just a gesture, as you say, with no intimacy – but who knows, one day an intimate hug might one day takeover a polite bow. That would be really great.

  17. One of my granddaughters has become a really loving hugger of late and every time to go to leave the hugging begins. At eight she of course is a lot shorter than I am and her hands wrap around my waist not being able to quite meet at the back but it still feels like a “circle of love” that comes from all of her and is complete. There’s definitely a lot of love in these hugs.

  18. Thank you Nikki you describe hugging beautifully . I always see hugging as ” an embrace ” embracing the truth of the other person and this is done at what every level of livingness each person is at . The embrace gives an opportunity for each person to deepen their love .

  19. I am yet to master the hug! Which means I am yet to master myself, because it is that split second before the hug (or even the days and nights before the hug) that really count. What state are we ourselves living in and what are we bringing to the hug?

  20. I love a genuine hug as they can communicate so much to both ourselves and another with the quality that we express them in.

  21. A hug is a sharing from heart to heart. The intimacy that I find in it, is the expansion of the love that is being shared. There is no place to hide myself, just the opening and surrender of what there is in me in that moment.

  22. In a hug we can feel a person, their current state of being as well as their development with themselves and others, the level of openness with people, how much they express, their delicateness and so much more – and just the same we get a reflection of ourselves and the aforementioned attributes.

  23. It is important for all human beings to have loving physical contact as that supports us to embrace ourselves and our bodies. As on planet earth we need a body temporarily. As the place we come from and will live is where we have no body.

  24. A hug is an expression of love, and how divine is it to feel a hug that comes from the heart. I too would rather not have a hug than have a hug that is functional, just done because it is expected. No abdication of responsibility here though, we are the ones that change it from functional to whole-hearted connection.

  25. I had a hug with one of my grandson’s today. It is not an unusual occurrence but today I could really feel the message that he was giving me; he was expressing love from every part of his being. He may have hugged me like this before and maybe I wasn’t aware of what the hug was saying but today it couldn’t be ignored just simply enjoyed with every part of me.

  26. Beautiful, Nikki. I too in the past have held back on the hugging front, due to an aversion of ‘pat on the back’ empty hugs. But what could be better than a full embrace, encircled in love from the front and behind? This is something I enjoy practicing very much these days!

  27. Empty and perfunctory hugs are a bane and don’t honour what we truly are; hugs in our fullness however, are a blessing and a beautiful confirmation.

  28. The particles we are made of, each and every one of us, are all universal and know each other by vibration and quality – they want to naturally pull together, be together and live harmoniously.

  29. The quality we live in will be felt in how we hug, so how we hug is a reflection of the level of responsibility we choose to live with.

    1. Absolutely – we are each divinely precious and the hug is symbolic of the spherical nature of our love and the fact that love is a beholding light that never lets us go.

  30. Each night before we go to bed the woman I share a house with and myself have recently started to give each other a hug goodnight. It feels so beautiful to hold each other for that moment, it’s a blessing I take into my sleep. We have been living with each other for over 9 years and it is so interesting that it has taken us this long to exchange such a loving gesture.

  31. In our society today we have become void and scared of true touch and intimacy simply because we are afraid of what the consequences might be in how it is received by another, it is a sad fact as we in truth crave touch and intimacy in our lives and it is through our willingness to connect deeper with ourselves that we can start to let others in as a natural way of being.

  32. The truth is – we either hug with our hearts or we hug with our heads. Visual absurdity aside, what this means is that we either hug from a place of connection of from a place of protection.

  33. I love reading your words “this circle of love is sealed with my hands resting on the back of your heart”, Nikki, as when I do, just sitting here, I can feel the gorgeousness of that all-embracing hug. I can feel that by the conscious placement of your hands that you are honouring the essence of the person by taking the time to make a deep and honest connection with them; very beautiful to feel.

  34. It’s obvious, but I never consider that our hearts are inline with each other when we hug. I love this. it’s like an immediate connection or plugging in to the simplicity of love.

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