Feeling Vulnerable – Feeling Me

The other morning I woke up feeling very vulnerable – I was tearful, head-achy and I felt fragile and sensitive to anything that was being said to me. The smallest comment would bring me to tears.

The night before I had attended an Esoteric Yoga session and the presenter did say that we may feel quite vulnerable in the first two weeks. I really did not believe her as I was feeling pretty good at the session, but here I am now – feeling vulnerable.

I was aware of something in my body telling me to “get rid of it,” to put this vulnerability aside and “get on with your day,” as I have done many times in the past: but today I decided to allow this vulnerability to be there and to deeply feel it.

I became aware of the many behaviours I could have gone into to reduce this vulnerability, to bury it back down again, and I felt pretty stunned with all the ways I had been doing this, until now:

  • Eating often and really wanting sweet things and nuts
  • Looking for distractions – making an excuse to go to the supermarket even though it could wait
  • Taking the dog for a walk when someone else could do this
  • Denying that anything is wrong when asked by my family and not asking for any support or help
  • Snapping and reacting to comments that family members innocently make
  • Turning the radio on to listen to the news in the car rather than just being with me
  • Itching to go out somewhere – the idea of shopping felt good
  • Busying myself with housework which I felt just had to get done
  • Feeling like I am a “martyr” having to do all these things and indulging in this
  • Choosing to write an assignment for my study that could wait as it was not due in for another week.

What a list! And all this to stop me from feeling my vulnerability, and because I was overriding what I felt, all the hurts would get buried in my body again.

I pondered on the things I could do instead; things that would support me and help me to explore what is underneath my vulnerability.

I could:

  • Stop and just feel, to spend time with me
  • Allow, appreciate and accept what is happening in my body
  • Share with my family how I am truly feeling and delegate the housework tasks
  • Listen to one of the many supportive recordings from Universal Medicine
  • Read some excerpts from the Purple Books, written by Serge Benhayon
  • Meditate and come back to the Gentle Breath
  • Dress in clothes which make me feel gorgeous and feminine
  • Spend time on my hair and makeup
  • Have an Esoteric Healing Session
  • Take myself for a gentle walk
  • Write a blog!

Why would I choose to bury how I am truly feeling when there are so many healing ways for me to feel and explore my vulnerability?

What I am learning is to accept that these vulnerable moments are part of my expression and that they are there to support me and to help me find my way back to me.

When I make a choice to bury how I am truly feeling, I miss an opportunity to heal the hurts/wounds that are sitting in my body and that just does not make sense.

I appreciate the continual support from Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine and from Jeanette Macdonald (my Esoteric Practitioner), who always inspire me to be all that I am every day and to accept that my vulnerability is an essential part of being me.

By Anne Hishon, a delicious woman, partner, mother, Registered Nurse, New Zealand

Related Reading:
Vulnerability: Opening the way for Healthier Relationships
A Vulnerable Moment
Vulnerability is ‘In’

1,748 thoughts on “Feeling Vulnerable – Feeling Me

  1. Anne what you have shared is very interesting as I have just spent a weekend with like minded people exploring the possibilities of love what it truly means and how we can avoid it and thereby stunt our evolution back to the universe. When I got home I wanted to go out for a walk as I felt unsettled but instead just stayed with the unsettlement in my body. This showed me I wanted to distract myself by going for a walk to stop myself from feeling the gift that had been on offer the entire weekend. The offer to love ourselves deeply because we actually deserve it and by loving ourselves we naturally love others it has a snowball affect.

  2. A few weeks ago due to something that happened I felt very vulnerable and fragile and I choose to just be with this, not go into thoughts, not go into reactions and not to go into what ifs but to know that I am loved, held and even though I felt I was in the unknown it was to trust, stay with me (be present in my body) and know things would unfold. This was a great lesson for me and I stayed with this feeling at work, at home and anywhere I was. Something I appreciated then and also now. It showed me that this is actually easy to do and when I allowed myself to just be I was also more allowing, open and loving with others.

  3. I recently was quite exhausted and unwell and I felt a discomfort around it, I couldn’t put my finger on what was needed, it was like I had this block in me and then I realised what I was feeling was quite vulnerable, once I surrendered to it I felt much better, I just allowed myself to be in it and for the vulnerability to be there and understand why I felt that way. It was kind of a revelation because I’ve never pinpointed feeling vulnerable so exactly, even though I’d say it’s often there. I’m now actually looking forward to exploring it more. Great topic Anne, thank you.

  4. So much can be learnt from listening to our bodies, and thus re-imprinting how we can parent ourselves, and deepens our relationship[p with those things that are true in our lives.

  5. This is such s great conversation, vulnerability has such a bad rap, yet we need the support to reclaim this valuable human experience and begin to remain open to ourselves, and love and support how sensitive we are. It’s been great to read this again today and take another look at how I’m truly feeling and if I’m judging feeling vulnerable and trying to avoid it.

  6. giving a whole different meaning to ‘being vulnerable’ ❤️ in other words be open to what we are feeling, allow ourselves to feel this and listen to what is needed to support ourselves in these moments ✨ Being vulnerable is accepting and appreciating our sensitivity.

  7. Sometimes we may not like what we are feeling, but what I find is that allowing myself space to really feel whatever is going on is the quickest way out, and it often brings about an amazing healing and insight that is just priceless.

  8. Allowing our sensitivities as you have shared Anne, allows us to deeply heal, so we can set a deeper platform of Love that allows us to deepen into this relationship we are having with Love or our Soul-full-essences or True purpose through our connection.

  9. Vulnerability for me was being weak. It took a while to experience that being vulnerable meant to except my feelings and not to deny it. That was a very powerful revelation for me.

  10. Anne I can so relate to what you are saying, the other morning I woke up feeling very vulnerable and teary. It’s lovely to come back to this part of me and know that I’m at last dropping the guard of protection I have been living with; by being afraid to show the world who I truly am. It’s not until I started to feel my vulnerability and sensitivity that I realised how closed off to life I have been.

  11. “When I make a choice to bury how I am truly feeling, I miss an opportunity to heal the hurts/wounds that are sitting in my body and that just does not make sense.” Choosing to feel one’s feelings with complete honesty without judgment leads to the understanding of the cause of the hurts and thereby the way to resolve them.

    1. This, jstewart51, has been a great learning for me too. To be able to look at my hurts with honesty starts the process of healing them and then we feel lighter in our bodies and more joyful because we are not carrying around all the unwanted baggage of life that we were not able to deal with at the time.

      1. Yes, although the weighing scales may not show a difference, however, I have been quite amazed how much lighter I feel having healed unresolved hurts.

  12. “When I make a choice to bury how I am truly feeling, I miss an opportunity to heal the hurts/wounds that are sitting in my body and that just does not make sense.” So true Anne. When we heal our hurts we are more available for ourselves but for others too. We bring less baggage to our relationships.

  13. At first, allowing ourselves to feel vulnerable takes some doing because we are so used to numbing it to the point of extinction but there does come a time when the numbing no longer works. As the author has pointed out it is part of our natural expression.

  14. All too often we will find something to do that fills a space that otherwise would offer us so much in terms of our connection to what we are truly feeling. Taking these moments to just be still and feel what is there for us to feel are worth their weight in gold.

    1. I was taught to do exactly that – keep busy – in order not to feel my feelings – at boarding school. Its taking a lifetime to override that pattern and to allow myself to stop and feel what’s there to be felt.

  15. I very much needed to read this blog today feeling vulnerable myself. I can appreciate that my distractions are lessening and I know it’s not worth it to bury my feelings.

  16. Stopping and feeling is such an important one, and one which I have found many ways to avoid doing. Now I am making myself build rituals of stopping and feeling to support me and finding that I am not liking what I am feeling, so that was why I was avoiding it.

  17. Being committed to a programme of a healing modality can bring about all kinds of thing. It’s wonderful when we can feel the practitioner’s support throughout and we feel empowered to stay with whatever the process we might find ourselves in, and accept and embrace what is being offered to us in full.

    1. I felt this beauty after surgery a few years ago now, but gradually I chose to allow old patterns take over again. A new year and time to continue to address this. allowing myself to feel vulnerable, especially when others are around.

  18. I had always thought vulnerability was a weakness and I now realise that there is a great strength and power in feeling our vulnerability.

  19. There is a huge surrender on offer when we are feeling vulnerable. So often we push through or feel that it’s consuming our life – but what if it is the stop moment offered by the body to stop, ponder and let go. Truly effortless is we allow and trust the body is supporting us.

  20. In the same way that we respond to a vulnerable newborn child and feel to nurture and cherish them, so too when we feel our own vulnerability is a time to nurture and cherish ourselves.

  21. So many beautiful ways to be with ourselves in our vulnerability, allowing accepting and appreciating what is there on offer to feel the truth of who we are more deeply.

  22. Thank you Anne, for you expressing your truth and vulnerability is an example of how we can live and stand for ourselves in life that is supportive, enriching and deeply loving, to us and everyone around us. It is through our living way that we can touch the heart of mankind.

  23. We are used to walking around in layers of protection that bloats and distorts our presence – all to stop us feeling our fragility and vulnerability which are actually our strengths.

  24. It is actually fundamental to allow ourselves to feel what we feel and express our feelings. And this is not just to show or share about our issues or hurts, daring to be transparent and feeling and expressing our power is what it is actually about.

  25. “Why would I choose to bury how I am truly feeling when there are so many healing ways for me to feel and explore my vulnerability?” Anne thank you again for this blog, another supportive read for me and an opportunity to examine my patterns of how I avoid or respond to how I feel.

  26. Honouring how we feel is essential for us to deepen our connection to who we are, all that we are in essence. As when we allow ourselves to be open and honest with how we feel, heal and let go of our hurts, we create space for greater love to be that which moves us.

  27. Exploring my vulnerability and taking responsibility for my feelings and my reactions, if I get through it, connects me to a deeper love in my body — vulnerability is a path to love.

  28. Those days can be precious as we can allow ourselves those days when they come, just to feel what’s going on, rather than to ‘soldier on’ and to fight how we are feeling. Feeling vulnerable is not a bad thing at all. It’s a time when we can really let others in too.

  29. Vulnerability is something I still go “Ahhhh” at when it comes along, I love it because I feel this opening up but I do resist it as well, because I can feel how open and transparent I am – it reminds me of being a child and my old hurts sometimes come up way and I freak out. However all said it is amazing to keep going there because I feel more amazing now then I ever have, and learning to be with the vulnerability is part of of this change in how I feel.

    1. It’s a great comment Samantha, and I was appreciating your reminder that the reason for feeling so amazing is because of the amount of hurts we let go of, a great inspiration to stay with things and feel, heal, and let go.

  30. Feeling vulnerable is a great marker which shows us that we are in connection with ourselves, it is what we choose as a result of this observation that is the million dollar question. Do we harden and bury the feeling or do we express it and allow understanding and healing to occur.

  31. Honouring and expressing how we feel is so important. I had a moment on the weekend when I really allowed myself to feel what was going on for me at the time and I just needed to cry. Once I allowed myself to do that, my whole body felt lighter and at ease again and I realised that normally I would suppress or push these feelings down and this makes me hardened and guarded with others. It is very liberating to allow ourselves to feel things and allow others to see what we are feeling.

    1. I love that you shared this Andrew, it is so true, we need to let it out if it is there to feel and not suppress it. We so often try and be tough, both men and women, but we loose out on our sensitivity and true sweet relationships when we do this.

  32. Beautiful, being ourselves; being vulnerable, open, truthful and inspiring is what we naturally are when we breathe in connection to who we are – truly Godly.

  33. I appreciate having access today to all the healing ways from Universal Medicine to feel us deeply and to heal the hurts and wounds that were buried in our body for so long. Learning to be there in my vulnerable moments is a work in progress for me but so loving and profound.

  34. I love this, how we can embrace vulnerability and how in fact if we don’t we just push those hurts we’re feeling back into the body, often deeper and we don’t address them. There is such a great understanding here that when our hurts are felt, they’re there for us to heal and if we honour and accept this we open the space to feeling so much more. So today as I feel vulnerable and hurt I can be with it without needing a distraction or a task to stop feeling, I can just be with it and feel all there is to feel.

  35. Vulnerability, is so beautifully real, it takes us to the depths of our being where we are deeply loved and supported.

  36. How often do we allow ourselves to feel what is going in our bodies? Truly and deeply. Becoming friends with your body and letting it have its say, is one of the bestest things you can ever do 🙂

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