Learning to Trust Men

All my life I have been frightened to trust men. I was raised with a father who abused alcohol, which made him feel quite frightening to me a lot of the time. I also watched a few too many episodes of ‘Australia’s Most Wanted,’ where men were portrayed as dangerous and appeared to do terrible things to women and children. This was confirmed when an older man tried to kiss me and flashed at me when I was about ten years old.

From all these events I carried a level of fear in my body for nearly all of my adult life. This fear impacted all my encounters with men and I expected them to prove to me they were worthy of being trusted.

In recent years, through attending some Universal Medicine events, I have met some lovely gentle men and this has allowed me to consider that maybe labelling most men as untrustworthy is a little extreme. From these connections I have slowly felt more comfortable to talk, and even be friends, with men who are not my partner.

Being open to trust these men has extended and allowed me to be more open with other men in my life, although I still felt there was no way I would be open to trust men who I considered strangers.

Well, let me tell you, history can be proven wrong in a moment if we are willing to trust ourselves and what we feel again.

For the last 6 years I have been redeveloping my ability to trust what I feel with the support of the Universal Medicine teachings and healing modalities. I have realised that this innate ability was something I had when I was little, but over time I had turned it off due to not knowing how to handle scary encounters with men.

I am happy to say I have now turned my ability to feel what is true back on and it played out recently when I gave a lift to a stranger who happened to be a man. Yep, you read correctly – a man – and one I didn’t know.

This unbelievable event occurred after I had been to a Sacred Movement women’s group where the focus was on connecting to what we feel in our bodies and, after this, I was feeling very lovely. As I left I met an older man (just to clarify, maybe 10 or so years older than me) who asked for directions as he had got off at the wrong bus stop. I happily used my phone to give him directions and, after realising it was a 20 minute walk and it was quite cold, I simply offered him a lift.

Yes, I offered him a lift without hesitation as I could feel I could trust this man and that he was just another person who needed a little support that day. Needless to say we had a lovely exchange and, as he got out of the car, I realised that I had let go of my lifelong mistrust of men.

Learning to trust men again would not have been possible without all the support from Serge Benhayon – who is the most trustworthy man I know – the men who attend the Universal Medicine events, and the Universal Medicine healing modalities that have supported me to trust what I feel in my body again.

By Sharon Gavioli, RN, Childbirth Educator, Counsellor, Brisbane, Australia, aged 54

Related Reading:
Women Trusting Men
Who can I Really Trust?
We are not our Hurts

1,274 thoughts on “Learning to Trust Men

  1. A beautiful transformation and testament of how healing is it for us all when men live in connection to the tenderness of who they are in essence, and how deepening our relationship with the sacredness of our essence allows us to develop a greater sense of knowing the truth of any situation as such living with power.

  2. Great that you have opened yourself for men, once more. Perhaps you have also learned to see that deep down men are just as tender, sweet and sensitive as women. We are that, but can also behave awfully. To that behavior every woman has to say no.

  3. The more we live from and honour our bodies the more we can let go of any old hurts and ways of being that are just not true anymore.

    1. Well said Elizabeth and so true that when we take responsibility for the quality in which we live, for healing our hurts, the impact this has on all our relationships and beyond is phenomenal yet feels very natural and honouring all round.

  4. That is very beautiful to read. We can build up a fear of the world if we are not open to it, and how we are actually deeply loving, sensitive people – and if we lived from our essence I am sure we would all be giving strangers lifts.

  5. I know this feeling, this feeling of being afraid of men. And I also know this realisation of how this fear is partly based on the views of others – that is, of how men have been portrayed – and also due to a few bad experiences which left me untrusting of all men, no matter how sweet and tender in their nature they may be. So in as much as it is a huge task to over come this, I feel that it is also perhaps incredibly simple, because there is already something there that is beautiful and actually quite easy to find when one is willing to see a man for who he truly is.

  6. Sharon, the healing that has occurred to allow for such a big turnaround in being able to trust where you didn’t trust before is profound and deeply inspiring.

  7. I love how natural it is to let go of our hurts to the point that once healed it actually feels normal to not have them influencing us any more.

  8. It’s beautiful how reconnecting with our whole body helps us to recognise and let go of imposing beliefs that we may have taken on; filters that colour our perception of people rather than simply sensing each person as they are.

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