I am beginning to realise how powerful it is just being me by connecting to the quality of who I am within. I have spent most of my 60 plus years of life living from my head and thinking I needed to constantly be available for everyone else. My way of doing this was by trying to fix things for everybody, often because I felt responsible for what others did or didn’t do.
I used to suggest solutions to problems or issues and steer people to what I thought would be solving the problem without really connecting to what would be truly supportive for that person to gain a new understanding for themselves as to why the issue was happening in the first place.
I have learnt that if I just stay with my body and myself and observe without the need to fix a situation, this allows more space for people to be responsible for their own lives, without my being attached to any outcomes.
I now know that the way to live my life is by just being me – and that is all that is needed.
This change in my approach started over three years ago when I began to re-connect to the truth of who we all are, as presented by Universal Medicine and in the book The Way It Is by Serge Benhayon. I had been searching for this truth all my life but had focussed on solutions to life’s issues instead of realising that the truth of everything is inside us all – in our inner-heart, our inner knowing through being with our bodies instead of being in our heads. In other words – JUST BEING who we truly are.
Over the last three years I have changed my behaviours because I am learning to keep re-connecting to the quality of my presence in my body – by being present with myself – and I am finding that this allows others to also be with themselves. I have found that I am not responsible for anyone else’s life and this fact alone means that I now have less stress and a more joyful life.
An example of this was demonstrated to me through a woman whom I had been visiting in a nursing home for some time and I was very close to. Previously I had tried to help by endeavouring to solve her problems as I felt responsible in some way – that’s the way my mind worked.
After attending a Universal Medicine retreat I became aware that to assist this woman the only thing I could do was to just be me. When I visited her and I stayed present with myself more consciously, just being me, then things started to change for both of us; her whole demeanour began to alter and her face looked soft, serene and pain-free. As I continued just being me and not falling into any old ‘doing’ or ‘fixing’ patterns, our relationship opened up and I began to feel a beautiful closeness and a deeper connection with her.
As I became more open to accepting her as she was, then magically there didn’t seem to be any problems to solve. I continued to take care of her daily needs but I did it with more love because I stayed present with myself and I found that I could now visit without becoming tired and drained.
I have realised that when I try to fix others people’s problems I am giving my energy away to something that I have no control over and hence I can become quite exhausted.
This woman has given me a wonderful gift: the opportunity to learn that I am enough just being myself – around her, and around everybody.
I reflect upon how all areas of my life are changing when I allow myself to just be myself and stay in my body. The power of that connection is all that is required and by accepting, loving and appreciating who I am, my relationships with people have changed for the better.
How I have learned to do this is to consciously breathe my own gentle breath that connects all of me to my body (bringing my head in line with what my body is doing) so that I can feel what I am doing and be present in every moment with whatever action I am undertaking. As I exhale I feel the rhythm of my breath as it flows through me, allowing further surrendering in my body. I now know that everything is part of the unfolding nature of life and the way this happens is by me just being in my body, trusting the process of life instead of trying to fix everything for everyone, and that is all that I need to do… just being me… simple!
By Susan Wilson, Albury