From Recognition to True Love – one student’s unfolding

by Anna Karam, Goonellabah, Australia

Before Universal Medicine, life for me was just a game of recognition. There were good days, there were bad, and this depended always on how much or how little I was recognised or accepted by others. The good days saw me loved, appreciated and valued, but this love, appreciation and value never came from within me, it always stemmed from the outside world – my family, peers or work colleagues. My relationship with life and with myself was totally dependent upon the amount of recognition I received. I was very much a product of what life dealt me!I spent many years fooling myself that I could get through life this way; in fact I couldn’t see any other way. I used the recognition I got as a way to confirm within myself that I was a good person – someone of worth, yet in truth I had so little self-worth that most of the time this false recognition I was getting couldn’t cover the deep ache and emptiness I was feeling in my heart, and forever trying to run from.

Looking back now I can see that I set myself up perfectly: I was the favourite child, my sisters always considered me the most attractive, most liked, most intelligent, best at sport – I couldn’t go wrong – yet the ache remained. While growing up I remember how much attention I got for being all the above, and how much it riled my sisters; they were riddled with jealousy, and even though this felt awful in my relationship with them, I needed to play this game otherwise I would have to feel my ache, and that to me felt all too much. I can now say none of the behaviour designed to get this attention felt right, yet there was no way I was giving it up.

By the time I was 15 I had developed a serious case of bulimia – a physical and mental torture that would go on into my 30’s and my life as a mother and wife. I hid all this very well and from the outside I had everyone fooled – at least I thought so. The recognition kept coming and I continued to use this as my way to get through life, but in truth I was a mess – with very little true regard for myself. At 30 a friend introduced me to a book titled ‘The Way It Is’, written by Serge Benhayon. We hadn’t seen each other in a long time and she had been having dreams about me and had the impulse to get back in touch – how grateful I am that she trusted this, for this was my first introduction to Universal Medicine. In the years between, have no doubt about it, I sought out every modality possible in a search for true healing. From western medicine and psychology, to a long list of alternative therapies including homeopathy, various schools of yoga, naturopathy, Buddhism, theosophy, reiki, a zillion different styles of meditation; you name it, I tried it. I was determined to find something of truth in this world, yet every direction I turned felt as if it was lacking. Somehow, I knew all of these modalities weren’t the answer; perhaps the greatest evidence for this was in the fact that nothing was truly changing in my life – the bulimia continued, as did all the physical self-abuse and mental torment that came with it.

True change for me came about through my association with Universal Medicine. In the beginning what was being presented wasn’t so easy for me to hear, but I couldn’t deny that what I felt was so different and so refreshing – it was music to my ears.  I was so used to being recognised and validated for all the things that I did, or the way that I looked. But here there was none of that. Instead I was met with love, and at first I didn’t even recognise this love because it had been so long since I had truly felt it from another; it felt completely different from all the recognition, pandering and niceness that I was so used to. From here I had to feel just how much my life was void of this love, yet in truth I was feeling this all along anyway; the ache and the emptiness were simply there because I wasn’t connecting to the love within myself – instead I had replaced it with another version that forever kept me longing for more, and never feeling complete or content within myself.

After living for so long without love, I wondered how it could be possible for me to feel love in my life. I came to realise that other individuals holding themselves in such love, in such regard and stillness, were in fact holding me in the same way (and all others they came in contact with); and whilst this was not something I could give to myself at that point, I could still feel this from them.

Because I could feel this love, I knew now I had a choice; this same love was within me – as it is equally within all – and it was up to me to feel this for myself, and to learn once again to bring this love to my daily life and expression. At first I found this difficult, there was so much self-doubt, self-criticism, and such a momentum of choosing to put myself as lesser and from there crave the old recognition I had for so long relied upon. But slowly, and with my commitment building to myself, things started to change. The bulimia I had once thought to be my lot in life is no more (yes – WOW!!), I am far more loving with myself and able to express this love more with others. My confidence is building; not the confidence I once had as a result of others recognising me, but a true confidence that comes from within. I am learning how simple and practical it is to be with myself and to love myself deeply, and from here how I feel towards others is naturally changing also. I no longer feel to cower or hide or protect myself, because I can feel that same love in them.

Universal Medicine has supported me in transforming a life of emptiness and craving recognition into a life that is more deeply and truly loving each day, and for this my appreciation has no end.

To list the ways in which Universal Medicine has supported me in all the above to be where I am today would take too long, and so I will say simply this: it has supported me to re-connect to the truth of who I am and the truth of who we all are – the truth of love. I have seen that there is another way to live and that I can change this at any time – in my own time – and that life is indeed a result of my own choosing, and not what others have done to me, as I was taught and thought. I have felt the importance of patience in learning to be loving with self, and to let go of judgment towards myself and others. I have felt the true meaning of responsibility and compassion – and of which my understanding is constantly deepening. And above all, I have felt that there is no end to how truly amazing we are, and how truly amazingly we are able to live if we simply allow ourselves to be… and stop trying to live up to all the expectations and demands that we, and the world at large, place on us.

281 thoughts on “From Recognition to True Love – one student’s unfolding

  1. We can think we have everyone fooled but when we meet Serge Benhayon we know we have been fooling ourselves. He meets everyone with equal love and this ignites the quest to rediscover the truth of who you are.

  2. To allow love into our lives and learn to deeply honour and love ourselves is one of the greatest blessings we can give to us and everyone else on this planet – it is what we miss so deeply and this deep lack and missing leads to all sorts of horrible behaviours.

  3. Thank you Anna, it’s truly amazing to read again of all the changes you have made and how life is for you now. Another miracle thanks to the support of Universal Medicine. I could relate to looking for recognition or approval in life but what I have now learnt is that all the love I need is actually within myself. It’s an ongoing process to remember that the needs I have for others could never equate to the true contentment of being connected to and sharing this love within.

  4. Universal Medicine has reminded me how awesome I am too, it’s been a massive catalyst of change for me, helping me to unpack and undo many really deeply harming behaviours that I lived with everyday, and supporting me to make choices that are true to myself and who I am and where my life is heading.

  5. “I used the recognition I got as a way to confirm within myself that I was a good person – someone of worth”. I can so relate to this Anna and as always looking for that recognition was so very ingrained in my life it has taken quite a while to break through it. But I have and these days seeking recognition is, in the main, a thing of the past but I still need to be very vigilant as it does try to sneak its way back in every now and then, and when it does it feels instantly horrible.

  6. The greatest gift of all is to understand that we already are absolutely everything with-in and all we ever need is there for with us always if we allow ourselves to connect to the all we are. This is an understanding that I truly appreciate from the presentations and living way shared by Serge Benhayon.

  7. True change was made for me, as well as many others, with our introduction to Universal Medicine presentations. Looking inward rather than outward is still a work in progress for me, but the changes already made are palpable. Living who we naturally all are is the way forward, which involves unpeeling the layers we have put upon ourselves. Living our true essence, which is one of love. What’s not to like?

  8. Universal Medicine is fantastic in the way they deliver such practical and useful tools to build self love back into our lives, it’s certainly revolutionised my whole life and whole way of being – and I truly love my life now.

  9. I agree, before Universal Medicine life was a struggle punctuated with misery. Life made no sense. Mankind made no sense. Now thanks to Universal Medicine everything makes sense and the struggle and misery have been banished from my life to be replaced with joy and glory.

  10. The need for recognition can show its face in a number of ways sometimes very obviously and at other times very subtle but every time I clock it and let it go there’s a feeling of liberation within my body. I have thrived on the attention I seeked from men and although I have to watch it, it does not give me the false safety and contentment like it did before. I’m not bothered because the connection I have to myself is greater.

  11. “I had so little self-worth that most of the time this false recognition I was getting couldn’t cover the deep ache and emptiness I was feeling in my heart, and forever trying to run from.” This feels deeply embedded within our society today.

  12. As you have shown Anna, Universal Medicine offers true change, it is not something we can always put into words or is tangible but we can feel it in our bodies and this is something that all the other modalities you tried while searching for an answer were not able to offer.

  13. It makes sense that if we are not willing or open to building a true and loving relationship with ourselves first that we constantly seek outside for the love and recognition that we are not wanting to choosing for ourselves. Learning to feel and be honest with ourselves starts the process of connecting to and reclaiming the love we naturally hold within us.

  14. “I was very much a product of what life dealt me” – I think this is true for many people. Many of us live in reaction to how we perceive the world and its people are receiving us (or not) as we believe that is where love comes from.

  15. Thank you for sharing Anna , it’s so wonderful that your friend heard your call for truth and now you are living truth , proof of what love is.

  16. A true love story – thank you Anna. Reading this helps me to appreciate the depth of love that is within me and that I have chosen to reconnect with. And I can feel it too.

  17. It is interesting how life operates. It is designed to show clearly that being the favourite child, the most attractive, the most liked, most intelligent, best in sport, is not it. So, that ’the all’ that you have is not it and is not the all.

  18. Learning to let go of all the expectations we place on ourselves, and take on from the world, is a huge work in progress but so worth it as we shed the layers of old patterns of behaviours. It is a forever deepening exercise, since there are so many expectations we hold of ourselves, down to the tiniest detail, that we often don’t even consider as expectations, assuming they’re just part of who we are, how we’ve always done things, etc.

  19. Before Universal Medicine I tried so many modalities purely to ‘fix’ me, I handed myself over willingly to another to tell me what was wrong with me and give me a special concoction or treatment that would make me brand new. I didn’t know what brand new looked like but that’s what I wanted, I didn’t want any pain, hurts, tension, anxiety or nervousness anymore. Then came Universal Medicine who presented we are already everything and amazing from the very beginning and there is nothing that needs ‘fixing’. I tried for a long time to get Universal Medicine Practitioners to fix me but they didn’t feed into my lack of self-worth and only ever held me in the utmost respect, love and all knowing who I am from the fact of who they are and we all are.

  20. Wonderful to read how you have initiated true change through reconnecting to your essence and the love within yourself as inspired through Serge Benhayon and the teachings of Universal Medicine.

  21. Great sharing Anna, and it’s amazing when we start to untangle ourselves from the webs of old ways we’ve created. What I feel clearly reading this is how recognition is a salve we use and it doesn’t work, our true way back is to see and feel the underlying choices we’ve made and to patiently and lovingly parent ourselves back to who we are; to let go the outer demands and expectations and simply come back to living and being us.

  22. Universal Medicine gets alot of attack in the press, and yet what I read in these blogs is time after time sharing their love of what has been presented, how supported they feel, and most of all thankful for re-introducing them to world which is full of magic and most importantly is rich in our relationship with God.

  23. Thank you for your raw honesty Anna and I can so relate to being caught up in chasing recognition from others whilst trying to find ways of dulling the ache of my inner emptiness. Universal Medicine presentations offer the opportunity to reconnect to the love that is always inside of us and needs no other to validate us.

  24. This is a beautiful acknowledgement of the vastness of what Universal Medicine offers us all ‘it has supported me to re-connect to the truth of who I am and the truth of who we all are – the truth of love.’

  25. I too was determined to find something of truth in this world, Anna. My search started in my late 20’s, took me to the far corners of the globe and back again and, as you write, I also found that ‘…every direction I turned felt as if it was lacking’. A simple presentation by Serge Benhayon and I knew I had landed at truth’s door.

  26. Our relationship with our life and ourselves can be completely turned around when we are willing to be honest with how we are living and feeling in our body. The more tender and loving we are with the way we move and hold ourselves the more aware we are to make choices that truly support us and build a true steadiness within our body that the need to seek outside for recognition just disappears.

  27. The game of replacing the love we so much miss in ourselves by recognition coming from outside, is a game that many many play and make the world goes round. Corporate life is built on it for example, making people go to extremes to get to the top. Just like a mountain climber or pop star, they discover they still feel this emptiness inside.

  28. “and that life is indeed a result of my own choosing, and not what others have done to me, ” these are such important words as so much of life is lived blaming others instead of taking responsibility for our own choices, but when we do true change and healing can be a part of our lives when we look within and connect to our own love.

  29. Eventually no matter how much recognition you get it doesn’t fill up the emptiness we feel in our heart, when we start taking responsibility and open ourselves up to love we slowly learn what life is truly about, love not recognition.

  30. This one story alone should be printed in the media, yet there are hundreds of stories like this from Universal Medicine students recovering themselves out of all kinds of trauma and self destructive behaviours. It’s truly amazing the true support that Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon are offering humanity.

  31. To embrace the love we are which is the love we come from, is the best blessing we can offer both to ourselves and to humanity. After all this is our purpose for being here on earth which is to be love and to share this unhindered with all.

  32. When we first taste true love we realise that the love we had met with and mostly dealt out in the world was far from true. Thank you for sharing your story and the awesome fact that we can turn around our life and come back to live the truth and love that we are if we so choose.

  33. We are able to initiate true change when we are willing to connect and express the love within us every day through listening and honouring what we are feeling in our body and dropping the false pattern of holding ourselves as lesser.

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